Three is enough for me!

Posted by  | Tuesday, October 18, 2011  at 9:12 PM  

Ok, so it hasn't always been enough for me! Being content with my three beautiful babies has not come quickly or easily. The number of biological kiddos in our family was decided for me earlier this year. In some ways, I'm grateful. My pregnancies are not easy and though I desire more children, its probably best that I don't put my body through that again. But that decision isn't up to me anymore! In addition, my husband and I don't have to wrestle with considering more permanent birth control options (vasectomy, tubal ligation or newer methods like Essure). On the other hand, I've grieved a little over Anna being my last baby. This fact however, has led me to savor more moments with her as well.

(Oh yeah! Thanks for voting in my STTN poll! I should go add my vote for Anna. She has started sleeping from about 7pm-7am at 4 months old. Praise the Lord. She is still crying some at bedtime, but once she's down, she's down. And I'm much more rested as well!) 

In January of this year, I had my last remaining ovary removed. My first was removed in July of 2010 when it was found to have a tumor on it. I'm not sure I ever updated, but after that first surgery my right ovary was found to have similar looking cyst/tumor on it as well. My doctors were still watching it when I got pregnant in October of 2010. They had advised against pregnancy, though in the words of my OB, "No one can tell you NOT to get pregnant." Yes, doc, we know! :)

My husband and I got to the point where we both felt very strongly that we needed to completely give this area over the Lord if we thought he might want more kids for us. I was able to conceive with just that one, tumor filled ovary. And my OB was quite shocked when I called, just three weeks after his above comment, to schedule my first prenatal appointment. :)

I had my last ovary removed when I was 18 weeks pregnant. We are so thankful that the Lord allowed that surgery to go smoothly and that he sustained the life of our sweet Anna. We were actually able to find out we were having a girl two days before the surgery. Sweet providence indeed!

I do still have my uterus, so after this last complicated delivery my OB was sure to warn me with, "Don't you even think about putting any donor eggs in that uterus!" Ha! (I'm not even sure that's possible...)

We do think this is the Lord's way of leading us to adoption at some point down the road. We will not rule out that possibility, though we aren't actively pursuing it at this time. Still praying about it and waiting to get my hands on this book! Just the other day, Adeline and I had this conversation even though I've never directly discussed any of this with her...

A: Mommy, I really want a baby brother. But you can't have one. 
Me: Do you mean you wanted Anna to be a boy?
A: No, I want Anna AND a baby brother. But you can't have one.
Me: Why can't I have one?
A: Because the doctor cut your tummy and now you can't have anymore babies.

At this point, I'm wondering how much else she knows about this topic...I didn't think this conversation had to happen until at least a few years past her wise age of THREE! The last thing she added was:

"I know! I'll just get a baby brother another day!"

Maybe we just will, sweet Adeline! :)

If you're curious as to my take on birth control prior to having my ovaries removed, I wrote about it here. It includes links to a wonderful article from Desiring God concerning birth control and family size.

Now back to the bigger question that I have. Permanent birth control options (sterilization sounds so strange...but I guess that's what it is?!). I have many friends going through those decisions right now and actually most have chosen vasectomy. I'm hoping to recruit one of them to write a guest post...since as far as I know, none of the POH husbands have made a decision on that yet.

In the meantime, we wanted to ask our readers if anyone would like to write a guest post about what they chose as far as permanent birth control? Or why you did not choose this option? Please email us if you would like to share. 

While we don't usually shy away from controversial topics, please remember to be respectful in your comments concerning this issue! Remember this article!!  :)

4 comments:

Brandy said...

OH, sweet Christina...If you are open to adoption and you read that book...and you will adopt! ;) Look out!

I like the same article you linked to for a decision for permanent birth control. The two questions: Is birth control consistent with the truth that children are a gift from the Lord? Shouldn't we let God determine the size of our family? If you read them in light of thinking "permanently," they are just as helpful with that question as thinking about timing of children and birth control/family planning.

For us, the question/decision is about stewardship of our lives--taking good care of the children we have and shepherding their souls, ministry, finances, serving the Lord overseas, logistics even--and desires to be done (that I used to never imagine having). We do feel that our quiver is full.

Christina said...

Brandy - maybe that's why I haven't immediately gotten my hands on the book. Somehow, I kind of figured that might be the case and I'm a little scared, to be honest!! :)

I sure do miss your quiver!! :) Love ya!

Laura said...

Christina, Greg got a vasectomy not long after our second child, Matt, was born. For us, it seemed like the right choice.

Cecilia said...

Though it isn't physically impossible for us (that we know of), we have been advised not to get pregnant anymore because of pregnancy complications. I really, really struggled with this, but I know the advice wasn't given lightly. My husband and I have planned to adopt since before we got married, so hopefully we will graft to our family that way.

PS: I was introduced to Taking Charge of Your Fertility on this blog and we successfully followed it's advice for a year. This is the method we would continue to use if a surprise pregnancy was safe.

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