Early Start Potty Training

Today's post is written by my friend, Anna. She has a very different experience with "potty learning" and started the process around 8 months old! Enjoy reading about her process and seeing the CUTE picture of her adorable little girl, Rachel! Also - in the picture, Rachel is wearing "babylegs" - a wonderful product for all babies, especially those who are potty training. We use our babylegs often when learning to crawl and on chilly days!




I switched my little girl from disposable diapers to cloth diapers when she was around 7 months old. What initially drove me to research the decision was an interest in early potty training, and I had read more than once that children in cloth diapers train an average of 6 months earlier than their paper-and-plastic diapered peers. Just after switching, I bought a Baby Bjorn Little Potty, made especially for the tiny bottoms of young babies. I sat Rachel on the potty two or three times a day in the beginning, and was happy to happen to catch whatever we happened to catch.

We had many successes, and I was amazed when we were catching more and more. Was she getting it?? Encouraged, I sat her on the potty more frequently, and had more successes. I reminded myself along the way that, even if she's not truly understanding, at least I'm saving diapers! By the time she was about 9 months old, I had to change very few poopy diapers, and she used the potty about half-time for peepee. I kept tabs on a "Potty Chart" on my blog, and considered it my science experiment of sorts. I remember having about a 10-week stretch during that time, when I changed ZERO poopy diapers--what bliss! I was anxious for Rachel to start telling me she needed to go. I taught her the sign for potty, and she started calling it "gngn," but she was forever unable to tell me when she needed to go. So we pressed on, and I continued to preempt her as much as I could. The biggest frustration I ran into at her young age is that she went peepee so often--I often logged a total of 10 or 11 separate peepees in one day! I'm still not sure whether most babies do that--maybe we just don't know it because we keep them wrapped up in diapers? Who knows, but I was determined to change her diaper each and every time she wet, even it it was just a little, even if she had gone only 20 minutes earlier. After all, if I ignored it, wouldn't she learn to do the same?

Even before becoming a parent, I cared for children often and in different capacities, and I thought through how I wanted to parent. Of course, some of that has changed with actual experience, but a lot hasn't. I am a very logical person, and somehow, child-led potty training always seemed inconsistent to me. We go to great lengths to teach the baby that the crib is where she sleeps and the high chair is where she eats. We start early saying it's not okay to stick fingers in outlets nor dive down stairs. Why don't we treat pottying like everything else? It made sense to me to start teaching Rachel as soon as she began to understand--that pants are not meant to hold peepee and poopy, but the potty is! The potty is made for that. It's not okay to go in your pants and keep it strapped to you. Ew!

So how long did it take for Rachel to be "potty trained?" FOREVER. In fact, right now, at 2 years and 2 months of age, she is tucked in her bed, sleeping soundly and wearing a diaper. She began wearing [cloth] training pants at 16 months (when the cheap Gerbers finally fit), but we had many frustrating, "accident"-filled days before I was confident to put her in true big girl undies. She's not quite got the motor skills to pull her pants down, sit herself on the potty, wipe, and reclothe, so we still have some time before I can rely on her to potty upon waking as well. I've learned to be patient, though, and I'll wait this one out, happy to be diaperless by day. I've called her "potty trained," always qualifying that with a "and we also use diapers some," for a long time--from the time when it was clear she knew what was going on. She knew the potty, knew what it was for, and used it--sometimes.

Would I recommend this method? Only to the mom with lots of patience. However, I would say we should be encouraged to consider that potty learning does not have to wait, even if the training does. There is no reason we can't talk to our babies about the potty and the bathroom, and the part those particulars play in our day-to-day lives. There is no reason to act like it's protocol to walk around with peepee in your pants, or to hide in a corner, standing, for a bowel movement. With plenty of conversation, children can understand a lot. If a child is expected to use his diaper for the first three years of his life, it is a big deal in his little world to suddenly change the expectation! Starting early certainly makes a long, frustrating, thankless process, but what parenting process isn't long, frustrating, and thankless?

Will I do it the same next time? I want to start even earlier and give EC a try with our next baby (due October 28!), although I am ever-so-skeptical. I do know that I will be much more patient and much less anxious as I step through the world of potty with baby number two, because I know that she will get it eventually. I cannot reverse my thinking, however, and will do what I can to catch what I can in the potty, at least so she knows that's what it's for and that's what we expect--eventually.

Thanks, Anna! The last paragraph mentions, "EC" also known as Elimination Communication. According to Wikipedia, "Elimination communication (EC) is a process by which a caregiver uses timing, signals, cues, and intuition to address an infant's excretive needs, partially or completely avoiding the use of diapers." For more information on EC - check out this link.