This is shared by my friend, Bekah, who is an amazing mom to six precious children!
Being a mom is the hardest job in the world, hands down. I’ve known this fact since I was a kid watching how hard my mom worked to love and care for myself and my younger brother. I didn’t necessarily know why it was hard, but it was apparent to me that it was a very important task, worthwhile in all aspects. I longed to be a mom since my earliest memories and now I am mom to 5 great kids, ages 11, 6, 5, 3, and 20 months. My husband and I are also expecting our 6th baby in November! I feel blessed to have been charged with rearing each of them.
As a mom I regularly find myself face to face with my greatest weaknesses. I love this part of being a mom. It is in these moments that I can let the Lord’s strength be made perfect in my weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). I know that the Lord’s grace is sufficient for everyone in every situation, but I love the abundance of opportunity I have in the mothering experience to lean on the Lord. I don’t make the right choice every time. Sometimes I still choose to try to do things on my own, aside from Gods’ instruction. And every time I learn that His way is the BEST way. And each time I live this out right in front of my kids!
I guess what I’m trying to say is that I love being able to love Jesus and depend on him privately, and often publicly, just by living my life as a wife and mom. I am eager to watch each of my children and observe how they respond to Jesus. I am sure that I will learn to trust Him more as the coming years require fervent prayer for their tender souls!
Teaching Toddlers Love For God and Love For Others
Posted by | Friday, August 28, 2009 at 6:48 PM
Hi everyone! I was asked by the lovely Leah Payne (great name!) to share about how I teach my toddler. My name is Leah Finn, and I have two children--Georgia, who will be three in October, and Baxter, who will be one in September (see end of post for a cute picture of them). Thank you for this opportunity to write for the wonderful Prayer of Hannah community.
In my mind, I always imagined I would have a structured teaching time with my children from a very young age. And then I had children! While right now a structured school time is not necessary for my toddler daughter, Georgia, it is important that I teach her something. The Well-Trained Mind (Susan Wise Bauer, Jessie Wise) points out that toddlers and pre-K children are sponges, but they have to be given water to soak up. I believe it is the parents’ responsibility to provide this knowledge (water) for small children who are so eager to learn.
My husband and I occasionally talk about things we need to teach Georgia, or areas in which she needs to develop. Often this is not a long conversation, but is something we will discuss as the thought occurs to us, or as a situation presents itself. Now that Georgia is almost three (and her younger brother, Baxter, is eleven months), our teaching centers around two main themes: love for God, and love for others.
We strive to teach Georgia and Baxter love for God, His word, and His church. The best means of doing this is by loving the Lord our God with all our heart, mind and strength, and displaying that love to our children. We talk about God, we pray to God, and we read about God.
As a family, we read the Bible together after dinner most evenings. There is a series of questions we go through with Georgia:
Q: “What is this?”
A: “The Bible”
Q: “And who does the Bible tell us about?”
A: “Jesus”
Q: “And what do we know about God’s Word?”
A: “God’s Word is true!”
We also use children’s storybook Bibles to read stories with Georgia—our favorite is the Jesus Storybook Bible—and I often tell her stories from the Bible while we are playing or talking. Memorization comes naturally to small children—they pick it up quickly, so saturate your child with Scripture verses! For example, Georgia knows Psalm 23. I learned the psalm as a small child, and I wanted to teach it to her. For several days, I would quote the psalm to her before she went to bed, or while I bathed her, or when we played outside. Soon I was able to drop the end of each phrase and she could finish it. Now she can say it on her own for the most part, with occasional cute toddler phrases thrown in. I look forward to memorizing more with her.
Worshipping with fellow believers in Christ plays a crucial role in our life, and we want to pass on that priority to our children. One of the ways we do that is by simply taking them to church from an early age. As such, we model the importance of church involvement to our children. We also speak of our church family, and talk with excitement of ‘going to be with our church’ on Sundays. We want to instill in Georgia and Baxter anticipation for corporate worship, and a love for fellow church members.
We hope to teach our children love and respect for others. We are from the South (does our daughter’s name not give it away?), and politeness is virtually required in the South! More importantly, politeness and respect in speech display kindness to others and are a means of showing Christ’s love to the world around us. Georgia has been taught from the time she could talk to say “Please,” “Thank you,” “Yes Ma’am/Sir,” and “No Ma’am/Sir”. Simply from repetition she has learned to say “Good morning, how are you this morning?” because we often ask her that question. Consequently, she responds, “I am doing well, thank you.” Sharing toys and books provides a regular object lesson for how to speak kindly and show love to others.
Though I do not sit down for a planned school time (yet) with my toddler, I realize more each day how teachable every moment is. It is my prayer that I will seize these teachable moments, and that my children’s hearts would be receptive to the Savior through the process.
In my mind, I always imagined I would have a structured teaching time with my children from a very young age. And then I had children! While right now a structured school time is not necessary for my toddler daughter, Georgia, it is important that I teach her something. The Well-Trained Mind (Susan Wise Bauer, Jessie Wise) points out that toddlers and pre-K children are sponges, but they have to be given water to soak up. I believe it is the parents’ responsibility to provide this knowledge (water) for small children who are so eager to learn.
My husband and I occasionally talk about things we need to teach Georgia, or areas in which she needs to develop. Often this is not a long conversation, but is something we will discuss as the thought occurs to us, or as a situation presents itself. Now that Georgia is almost three (and her younger brother, Baxter, is eleven months), our teaching centers around two main themes: love for God, and love for others.
We strive to teach Georgia and Baxter love for God, His word, and His church. The best means of doing this is by loving the Lord our God with all our heart, mind and strength, and displaying that love to our children. We talk about God, we pray to God, and we read about God.
As a family, we read the Bible together after dinner most evenings. There is a series of questions we go through with Georgia:
Q: “What is this?”
A: “The Bible”
Q: “And who does the Bible tell us about?”
A: “Jesus”
Q: “And what do we know about God’s Word?”
A: “God’s Word is true!”
We also use children’s storybook Bibles to read stories with Georgia—our favorite is the Jesus Storybook Bible—and I often tell her stories from the Bible while we are playing or talking. Memorization comes naturally to small children—they pick it up quickly, so saturate your child with Scripture verses! For example, Georgia knows Psalm 23. I learned the psalm as a small child, and I wanted to teach it to her. For several days, I would quote the psalm to her before she went to bed, or while I bathed her, or when we played outside. Soon I was able to drop the end of each phrase and she could finish it. Now she can say it on her own for the most part, with occasional cute toddler phrases thrown in. I look forward to memorizing more with her.
Worshipping with fellow believers in Christ plays a crucial role in our life, and we want to pass on that priority to our children. One of the ways we do that is by simply taking them to church from an early age. As such, we model the importance of church involvement to our children. We also speak of our church family, and talk with excitement of ‘going to be with our church’ on Sundays. We want to instill in Georgia and Baxter anticipation for corporate worship, and a love for fellow church members.
We hope to teach our children love and respect for others. We are from the South (does our daughter’s name not give it away?), and politeness is virtually required in the South! More importantly, politeness and respect in speech display kindness to others and are a means of showing Christ’s love to the world around us. Georgia has been taught from the time she could talk to say “Please,” “Thank you,” “Yes Ma’am/Sir,” and “No Ma’am/Sir”. Simply from repetition she has learned to say “Good morning, how are you this morning?” because we often ask her that question. Consequently, she responds, “I am doing well, thank you.” Sharing toys and books provides a regular object lesson for how to speak kindly and show love to others.
Though I do not sit down for a planned school time (yet) with my toddler, I realize more each day how teachable every moment is. It is my prayer that I will seize these teachable moments, and that my children’s hearts would be receptive to the Savior through the process.
Toddler Teach? Or Toddler Play?
Posted by |
at 2:03 PM
It's funny that this weeks topic is titled, "Toddler Teach and Play." You see, we have spent almost all summer debating over which direction we should head with my son (turned 3 in June). I know this week isn't about home school versus preschool - but that was my debate. I won't go into the pros and cons that we hashed out because I think they are SO different for every family and every situation.
In the end we decided that he would benefit from the structure of doing AWANA each week at church, in addition to Sunday mornings of course and possibly some gymnastics or soccer lessons. If I added preschool in the mix - even just two mornings a week - I really felt like I was going to miss out on valuable time with him. So we've decided to embark on a slightly more structured version of what we were already doing at home. I hesitate to call it "homeschooling" yet - but that is really what we're preparing for in a few more years.
Even deciding to add a little more structure to our "play" time was difficult. I guess the question really was do I just let him continue "playing" or do I get more intentional about "teaching" him as well - whether through a preschool or at home? Margaret was so sweet to remind me that toddlers learn SO MUCH from just simply playing! That is really all they need for quite a while. No Mom should feel guilty for not enrolling their child in preschool or not adopting an official home school plan for their toddler or preschooler! They learn so much from playing, reading and interacting - preschool isn't necessary to accomplish those things.
For us, I felt as though I still needed the accountability of a slightly more structured plan to our "teach and play" time. I needed to get a little more serious with encouraging him to persevere through a task (like a puzzle) and finish the whole thing - assuming its age appropriate. After much research over options - I settled on what I think to be a SUPER easy to use and zero stress plan for myself and for Will!
ABC Jesus Loves Me!
It is a FREE three and four year old curriculum written by a Mom! ABC Jesus Loves me is "a free Preschool Curriculum website - Dedicated to preparing a child for Kindergarten in a simple and non-stressful way while giving the child a solid foundation in both the Bible and education."
It includes lessons for 36 weeks and is all laid out for you - charts and all! There are lots of printables and really everything you need (besides a few books from the library!). The three year old curriculum covers a bible story, bible verse (with a song to memorize with), letters and/or numbers, colors and other activities to build on each week. All the activities correlate and the lessons and bible stories line up with holidays as well. Obviously, you can pick and choose parts that you and your child do. If nothing else, it is a wealth of information for age-appropriate activities for three and four year olds.
It's written to start this week, the fourth week of August. We have worked on it this week - and its been so FUN for Will. He begs me to do "school" with him and read his "One Book." This week's bible story is about Creation Days 1 and 2 and while he still hasn't mastered the story, its OK because it can carry over to next week when we add Creation Days 3 and 4!
This week's colors are blue, black and white. One activity for practicing the colors was to give the child a flashlight and have them go around the house shining the light on all things of a certain color. Will has done that for at least 10 minutes several times a day. He is BEYOND excited when he finds something with his flashlight.
Overall, this method of "teaching" my toddler - well, preschooler - is working great for us so far! Has anyone else chosen a more intentional method or curriculum for their toddler or preschooler? We'd love to hear about it!
Teaching My Toddler is Fun!
Posted by |
at 12:59 PM
Hi! I'm Meagan DeLong, a friend of Leah's and a Mommy to a 7-month old and a 2-year old. When I first thought about the topic for this week, I didn’t think I’d have much to write about. I don’t do any “formal” teaching with my 2-year old, Karis. I really don’t think you have to work very hard to teach toddlers. They just naturally soak up every bit of information around them. So I thought I'd just share some ways that we have really enjoyed learning together and some of our favorite resources:
1. Doing what Mommy does --- Karis helps me do all my chores. I could get them done much more efficiently during naps and after she goes to bed, but I usually save them for her. It takes longer and might even be twice the work, but she loves it and is learning so much! She sweeps the floor, helps me put clothes away, and even does dishes. (Ok, maybe she just likes to play in the bubbles, but she is always there right beside me! :) We use all natural cleaners like vinegar and tea tree oil, so she even helps me scrub the bathrooms! Cooking is absolutely her favorite thing to do. Karis has put her little fingers in everything that I have cooked ever since she was big enough to stand on a chair by me at the counter. She is actually getting to be quite a helper now because she knows the names of all my cooking utensils and can hand me things. If I am chopping vegetables, then I give her the My Safe Cutter from Pampered Chef and she just saws away at her own little carrot. Sometimes it can be frustrating, like today when we were making Healthy Chocolate Candy (her potty training treat :) and she sneezed right in the pan. But it’s always so much more exciting to do it with my toddler!
2. Singing – my toddler learns through song better than anything else! I always have songs in my head, so when Karis was very young, I just started singing them out-loud to her. She already knows so many hymn/worship songs by heart and will randomly start singing "Holy, Holy, Holy," "Tis' So Sweet," or "My Jesus I Love Thee" while doing dishes or swinging outside. It melts my heart. I know that she doesn’t completely understand what the words mean yet, but I hope that as her understanding grows over time those words will be as special to her as they are to me. I thought I would try to teach her Bible Verses, but my stubborn 2-year old had absolutely no interest whatsoever until I put it to a melody and started singing the Bible Verse. Now she begs me to sing it over and over! Songs are also great for teaching the alphabet, numbers, etc. My Mom is a speech teacher and made me a copy of one of her teaching Cd's, Sounds Like Fun. There is one song that goes through each sound that a letter makes and a word using those sounds. Within a week, Karis could make every sound on the song and was singing the whole thing to me from memory! It is also a very mellow CD and is great for calming my girls down on car trips :)
3.
My First Bob Books – These are cute little colorful books with silly pictures and stories. Karis loved the Alphabet set when we got it at 18 months, and she started really loving the Pre-Reading Skills set about the time she turned two. But even before she could completely follow the stories she loved flipping through the cute little books and looking at the silly pictures. I went ahead and bought them because they are all bound together in a fat cover at the library and Karis really enjoyed having all the separate little books to flip through so much more.
My “A” Sound Box books – There is a “sound box” book for every letter and Karis thinks they are so much fun! Because of these books, she has started picking out letters in other books that we read!
My Very First Library by Eric Carle – These are fun because the board book is cut in half to enable the child to read it on his own, kind of like a puzzle. For instance, Karis sees the blue top page and will flip through to find the matching blue bird on one of the bottom pages. The library includes colors, shapes, words, and numbers.
Anything by Dr. Seuss – I have been so amazed that my busy toddler will sit through several of these long books at a time. She absolutely loves the Cat in the Hat, The Diggingest Dog, and especially Go! Dog Go! The last one is my favorite because it taught her prepositions correctly at a really young age.
Brown Bear, Brown Bear – I love this book because of the repetition and color recognition. I started reading it to Karis when she was just days old and so far, this is the only book that Karis can read completely on her own.
4. Coloring – It sounds simple, but it is really the best preparation for writing I can do with her! And I love it; it is so relaxing! I color with her and help fix her fingers if she forgets the correct way to hold the crayon. We “chat” about the picture we are coloring, the color of our crayon, or sing whatever song pops into her head. It is definitely one of my favorite things to do with my girl!
Well, this post ended up being a lot longer than I expected, but I hope that I was able to convey that teaching a toddler does not have to be hard work at all – it can be pure fun and a completely natural part of your everyday routine!
Toddler Teach and Play
Posted by | Monday, August 24, 2009 at 3:43 PM
Kids are busy. There is no doubt about it! I know sometimes when my daughter is tired of her toys, she just seems to wander around the house, waiting for me to give her something to do. She wants to be busy doing something, and I need to be prepared with fresh ideas to engage her in learning and play. With kids three and under, playing is learning! I have to remind myself that my toddler can really have a good time doing very simple tasks. Just pulling your child up to a sink full of cool water and giving her spoons and cups to measure and pour with is learning! Put and apron on her and have a large towel nearby and she’ll have a great time! While I love simple activities like this, I do try to have some “educational” toys in a closet that I can rotate when she tires of the ones she usually has out. I find that puzzles are wonderful for teaching concentration and problem solving, and you can pick up cheap ones anywhere. My daughter and son really like lacing spools and cards too (you can make them yourself!). I also always have art supplies around. Kids love to do art projects and they can learn so much! They can learn about how colors mix by playing with water color paint. 
Don’t throw away scraps of paper or string! I keep them in a small box in my art cupboard and my daughter loves to glue them down to a piece of construction paper (Hollie also had this great idea on her blog for doing glue-less art projects!). Finger paints are also nice. I draw basic shapes on paper and have her try to color in the shapes with her fingers. You can get more specific with your directions as your kids grow. Have them color in all the squares blue, the hearts red, etc. I’m generally not a spontaneously creative person and have to see an idea somewhere before I think of trying it. So, don’t underestimate the importance of checking out books about engaging children in learning and play at your library. This one by Trish Kauffner is one of my favorites. She has TONS of ideas to keep your kids busy and most of them use things you already have around the house. Use other people as resources, even blogs can be valuable sources of information. Kids can be a great source of inspiration too because everything is so new to them! When you find bugs outside, try to engage your kids by having them watch it carefully to learn how it moves. If you see a racoon in your yard, spend some time looking up other pictures of them online and try to make a racoon face out of a paper plate. Your kids will remember many of these things and will learn so much while they are having fun.
Don’t throw away scraps of paper or string! I keep them in a small box in my art cupboard and my daughter loves to glue them down to a piece of construction paper (Hollie also had this great idea on her blog for doing glue-less art projects!). Finger paints are also nice. I draw basic shapes on paper and have her try to color in the shapes with her fingers. You can get more specific with your directions as your kids grow. Have them color in all the squares blue, the hearts red, etc. I’m generally not a spontaneously creative person and have to see an idea somewhere before I think of trying it. So, don’t underestimate the importance of checking out books about engaging children in learning and play at your library. This one by Trish Kauffner is one of my favorites. She has TONS of ideas to keep your kids busy and most of them use things you already have around the house. Use other people as resources, even blogs can be valuable sources of information. Kids can be a great source of inspiration too because everything is so new to them! When you find bugs outside, try to engage your kids by having them watch it carefully to learn how it moves. If you see a racoon in your yard, spend some time looking up other pictures of them online and try to make a racoon face out of a paper plate. Your kids will remember many of these things and will learn so much while they are having fun.Welcome Baby & Please Pray
Posted by | Sunday, August 23, 2009 at 2:36 PM
A huge welcome to sweet Baby Girl Carson - Mattie Rebecca, brand new daughter to Hugh & Hollie Carson and little sister to Laney. She was born Sunday morning after a tough labor and delivery. She's also now taken up residence in the NICU. Here's the info from Hollie's blog:
Here is the situation. Mattie Rebecca was born around 7am this morning. She was with us doing well for 3 hours until we noticed that her color was a bit dull. They took her to the NICU b/c her heart isn't getting enough oxygen into her blood. They just came back with her blood oxygen levels showing that it is more serious than fluid on her lungs. It is either pneumonia or some time of congenital heart defect. They will be doing an ultrasound shortly to see if there are any structural problems with her heart to hopefully rule out heart problems. Please pray that it is only pneumonia and that the meds will take care of that problem. It looks like Mattie will be here for at least a week. Also, she will more than likely be put on a ventilator unless there are signs of great improvement.
The other problem is that Hollie will be getting a blood transfusion in about an hour. She lost too much blood during labor.
Please pray that Mattie's heart is ok AND that she will quickly recover to get oxygen into her blood.
Please pray that the transfusion will go smoothly for Hollie so that she can recover and go to see Mattie in NICU.
Please pray that our faith in God's goodness and providence would remain and grow in this season.
Here is the situation. Mattie Rebecca was born around 7am this morning. She was with us doing well for 3 hours until we noticed that her color was a bit dull. They took her to the NICU b/c her heart isn't getting enough oxygen into her blood. They just came back with her blood oxygen levels showing that it is more serious than fluid on her lungs. It is either pneumonia or some time of congenital heart defect. They will be doing an ultrasound shortly to see if there are any structural problems with her heart to hopefully rule out heart problems. Please pray that it is only pneumonia and that the meds will take care of that problem. It looks like Mattie will be here for at least a week. Also, she will more than likely be put on a ventilator unless there are signs of great improvement.
The other problem is that Hollie will be getting a blood transfusion in about an hour. She lost too much blood during labor.
Please pray that Mattie's heart is ok AND that she will quickly recover to get oxygen into her blood.
Please pray that the transfusion will go smoothly for Hollie so that she can recover and go to see Mattie in NICU.
Please pray that our faith in God's goodness and providence would remain and grow in this season.
The Blog Frog
Posted by |
at 2:19 PM
Hi all. Just wanted to remind you to check out The Blog Frog on the left-hand side of the Prayer of Hannah blog. There are some great discussions going on there. I just started one titled "Your Daily Schedule" where you can share what your schedule looks like on a day-in, day-out basis. Mariah had asked for some example schedules and I thought The Blog Frog would be a great place for all of us to share with her what life looks like for each of us. Feel free to leave your schedule there as well. Thanks!
Ask An Author: Balancing kids
Posted by | Friday, August 21, 2009 at 9:22 AM
I am still struggling with juggling my 2 kids, 34 months and 8 months. I want to get my schedule / routine back. Any tips for managing 2 young children? (specifically grocery shopping, bath times, meal times, etc.)
First of all, when the POH authors were planning our "ask an author" answers, Krista mentioned something about this question. I don't think she is going to post an answer specific to this question so I wanted to include her little nugget of wisdom. :) She said, "Make a plan, carry it out; adjust as necessary to fit your life and schedule that day. Parents make the plan so that kids (or life) won’t take away from what you need to get done."
So, that is my answer in a nutshell in case you want to stop reading now.
Seriously though, planning ahead is really the key. Anticipating your next step and always anticipating your kids needs can be difficult! I was just talking with a friend today about how every parenting decision is not just one decision - there are a million things to consider.
(I was saying this in reference how we made the decision to have a toy bin in our car. It seemed toys were constantly ending up in my van anyways - so why not designate a spot for them? Well, because now my kids expect to have toys in the car and I'm wishing I never created that bin!)
Back your question - here are some quick tips to manage the situations you mentioned.
1. grocery shopping - don't take the kids! That is the simplest and easiest solution. Although, it is not always practical. I try to do my grocery trips in the evenings or naptime on the weekends. If it isn't possible because of a busy week, my next step is to find someone else to watch my kids (or half of them :) If they MUST go with me - I definitely have a list and plenty of snacks. I don't go near a meal time when they are likely to have meltdowns. I go first thing in the morning after breakfast! If I've got all three with me (I keep a little girl during the week) then I wear someone on my back using the ergo.
2. Bath times are Daddy time in our house. My husband gives baths almost every night. We have a great system worked out where he gives the baths and supervises that time while I spend those few minutes straightening the kids rooms, putting away their clean clothes, laying out PJs, laying out church clothes or clothes for the next day, etc. Then I am ready to grab wet kids out of the tub and continue with the bedtime routine.
3. Meal times - especially dinner - are commonly the toughest times of the day. (According to the Moms that I talk to!) Some ideas are to do all the prepwork possible during naptime. That way there is less to do once the kids are awake. When you do have to get in the kitchen to finish - and if hubby isn't home to occupy them yet - get them good and settled with a special activity before you start. I use that time to get out my son's Color Wonder books, puzzles and other table activities. Adeline (17 months) usually still wanders around playing, but at least she isn't getting into fights with her brother!
First of all, when the POH authors were planning our "ask an author" answers, Krista mentioned something about this question. I don't think she is going to post an answer specific to this question so I wanted to include her little nugget of wisdom. :) She said, "Make a plan, carry it out; adjust as necessary to fit your life and schedule that day. Parents make the plan so that kids (or life) won’t take away from what you need to get done."
So, that is my answer in a nutshell in case you want to stop reading now.
Seriously though, planning ahead is really the key. Anticipating your next step and always anticipating your kids needs can be difficult! I was just talking with a friend today about how every parenting decision is not just one decision - there are a million things to consider.
(I was saying this in reference how we made the decision to have a toy bin in our car. It seemed toys were constantly ending up in my van anyways - so why not designate a spot for them? Well, because now my kids expect to have toys in the car and I'm wishing I never created that bin!)
Back your question - here are some quick tips to manage the situations you mentioned.
1. grocery shopping - don't take the kids! That is the simplest and easiest solution. Although, it is not always practical. I try to do my grocery trips in the evenings or naptime on the weekends. If it isn't possible because of a busy week, my next step is to find someone else to watch my kids (or half of them :) If they MUST go with me - I definitely have a list and plenty of snacks. I don't go near a meal time when they are likely to have meltdowns. I go first thing in the morning after breakfast! If I've got all three with me (I keep a little girl during the week) then I wear someone on my back using the ergo.
2. Bath times are Daddy time in our house. My husband gives baths almost every night. We have a great system worked out where he gives the baths and supervises that time while I spend those few minutes straightening the kids rooms, putting away their clean clothes, laying out PJs, laying out church clothes or clothes for the next day, etc. Then I am ready to grab wet kids out of the tub and continue with the bedtime routine.
3. Meal times - especially dinner - are commonly the toughest times of the day. (According to the Moms that I talk to!) Some ideas are to do all the prepwork possible during naptime. That way there is less to do once the kids are awake. When you do have to get in the kitchen to finish - and if hubby isn't home to occupy them yet - get them good and settled with a special activity before you start. I use that time to get out my son's Color Wonder books, puzzles and other table activities. Adeline (17 months) usually still wanders around playing, but at least she isn't getting into fights with her brother!
Ask an Author: Making Friends in a New City
Posted by |
at 8:00 AM
This post is in response to a question we had about how to make friends in a new city.
We moved to Chicago about a year and a half ago. I didn't know anyone in the city and we don't have any family here. We were starting from scratch in the friends department.
The first and easiest way to make friends is to find a church family. The great church search can be really overwhelming. My advice here is to not just attend the morning worship service, but attend a Sunday School class from the very beginning. This really helps to meet people and to get a good feel for what life in the church family will be like. We started attending a church right away and I started going to the weekly ladies' Bible study the first week. This was a great way to meet other moms. We only went to the church for about 2 months before we switched to another church that was a better fit for us. But I kept going to the ladies' Bible study because I liked the moms. After the semester was over, I stopped going to the Bible study and started going to a Bible study at our new church. If I would have waited to start attending a small group until we were "settled" in a church family, I would have gone months and months without any other mom friends. Diving right in gives you a much better chance of making friends.
Another way to make friends is by getting your kids involved in community activities. I took Samuel to a weekly gymnastics class and met some moms that way. I took my kids to the park and chatted with the other moms. We started going to story time at the library. I was proactive in making friends. You may not be a natural extrovert, but if you can make a little effort to initiate a conversation and tell the other mom that you are new to the area, it goes a long way in making friends.
I know that there are networking websites out there as well that help organize mom groups. Meetup.com has a few, like this mom's group and this SAHMs group. Another website is RaisingThem.com. I don't have any personal experience with this, but it is another option.
The key is to just look around you as you go about your day to day business with your kids. There are plenty of other moms out there looking for a friend as well. We just have to be bold enough to say that out loud. As time goes by, some of these friendships have stuck and grown and some have faded away. But I'm thankful for the friends God is putting in my life and the ways He continues to challenge me through them.
We moved to Chicago about a year and a half ago. I didn't know anyone in the city and we don't have any family here. We were starting from scratch in the friends department.
The first and easiest way to make friends is to find a church family. The great church search can be really overwhelming. My advice here is to not just attend the morning worship service, but attend a Sunday School class from the very beginning. This really helps to meet people and to get a good feel for what life in the church family will be like. We started attending a church right away and I started going to the weekly ladies' Bible study the first week. This was a great way to meet other moms. We only went to the church for about 2 months before we switched to another church that was a better fit for us. But I kept going to the ladies' Bible study because I liked the moms. After the semester was over, I stopped going to the Bible study and started going to a Bible study at our new church. If I would have waited to start attending a small group until we were "settled" in a church family, I would have gone months and months without any other mom friends. Diving right in gives you a much better chance of making friends.
Another way to make friends is by getting your kids involved in community activities. I took Samuel to a weekly gymnastics class and met some moms that way. I took my kids to the park and chatted with the other moms. We started going to story time at the library. I was proactive in making friends. You may not be a natural extrovert, but if you can make a little effort to initiate a conversation and tell the other mom that you are new to the area, it goes a long way in making friends.
I know that there are networking websites out there as well that help organize mom groups. Meetup.com has a few, like this mom's group and this SAHMs group. Another website is RaisingThem.com. I don't have any personal experience with this, but it is another option.
The key is to just look around you as you go about your day to day business with your kids. There are plenty of other moms out there looking for a friend as well. We just have to be bold enough to say that out loud. As time goes by, some of these friendships have stuck and grown and some have faded away. But I'm thankful for the friends God is putting in my life and the ways He continues to challenge me through them.
Ask An Author: Bedtimes Part II
Posted by | Thursday, August 20, 2009 at 10:48 PM
Hey, I thought I would chime in with my answers to these questions:
1. Just wondering what kind of bedtime routine you all use to get your kids around this age to go to sleep! My 2 1/2 year old refuses to lay down in her bed by herself at night and go to sleep on her own. Once she is asleep...she stays that way all night, but it is a battle every night to get her to sleep.
For my almost 3 year old, bedtime routine is to pick out a book, go up to bed, read one book and a few Bible stories. Then I kiss him and say goodnight. He says he needs a drink of water. I tell him he can have a drink of water if he comes straight back to bed and goes to sleep. He agrees. We get a drink, then get back in bed. I kiss him goodnight and leave the room. This is a BIG improvement over where we were two months ago when this question was e-mailed to us! At that point, I was having to lie down with Samuel and have him beg me to stay in bed with him and "sleep with him a little bit". It was DRAMA and it took me forever to get out of there. My first tactic was to stop lying down with him to read. I sat up instead. And then I made the drink of water deal with him. Finally, I had to just deal with two nights of crying and throwing a fit - I would keep putting him in bed and then leaving the room. He only cried for about 30 minutes the first night, 20 minutes the second, and none the next.
Bedtime routine for Joel, 17 months old, is to read a book in his room, rock in the glider for about 5 minutes and then lay him down in the crib awake. He talks to himself for awhile and then falls asleep. We "cried it out" with him around 4 months old and have been on this routine ever since.
2. What made you decide to promote your child out of a crib into a toddler bed? How did you guys go about doing that and getting them to stay in the bed?
I also promoted Samuel out of the crib b/c I needed it for Baby #2. We put a twin mattress on the floor in Samuel's room before Joel was born (he was about 17 months). We didn't ask him to sleep in it, we just wanted it to be there and have him get used to the idea. Eventually we asked him if he wanted to take his nap in it and he did (around 19 months). It went great. Over a period of two weeks we gave him the option of sleeping in his crib or his bed. He was about 50/50 in choosing. Then we moved to our new house and he had his new room with his big boy bed (he was 22 months). He slept in it fine and we've never looked back.
Now, as far as staying in bed - We didn't make it a rule that Samuel couldn't get out of bed on his own. When he is done sleeping, he gets out of bed and leaves his room - he can reach the door handle and open it himself. He comes downstairs by himself and finds me. He also gets up in the early morning sometimes and comes to sleep in our bed with us. This is fine with us, so I don't force him to go back to bed. I don't worry about Samuel falling down the stairs. BUT, once we move Joel upstairs, we will put in a baby gate in the hallway so that he can't get down the stairs by himself - he's still too little to be trusted.
My decision to move Joel from crib to bed won't be motivated by Baby #3 this time (no baby #3 for us yet!). We've bought a little toddler bed for him and have just set it up in Samuel's room. We've let Joel take one nap in it, but he woke up early and freaked out a bit. We'll try again in a few weeks. We would really like to have him up in his bed in Samuel's room by the time I have my next surgery (end of October and he will be 19 months old), so that we can have the nursery converted back to a guest room for my parents. But I realize that is a double transition - to a bed and to sharing a bedroom. I'll let you know how it goes.
1. Just wondering what kind of bedtime routine you all use to get your kids around this age to go to sleep! My 2 1/2 year old refuses to lay down in her bed by herself at night and go to sleep on her own. Once she is asleep...she stays that way all night, but it is a battle every night to get her to sleep.
For my almost 3 year old, bedtime routine is to pick out a book, go up to bed, read one book and a few Bible stories. Then I kiss him and say goodnight. He says he needs a drink of water. I tell him he can have a drink of water if he comes straight back to bed and goes to sleep. He agrees. We get a drink, then get back in bed. I kiss him goodnight and leave the room. This is a BIG improvement over where we were two months ago when this question was e-mailed to us! At that point, I was having to lie down with Samuel and have him beg me to stay in bed with him and "sleep with him a little bit". It was DRAMA and it took me forever to get out of there. My first tactic was to stop lying down with him to read. I sat up instead. And then I made the drink of water deal with him. Finally, I had to just deal with two nights of crying and throwing a fit - I would keep putting him in bed and then leaving the room. He only cried for about 30 minutes the first night, 20 minutes the second, and none the next.
Bedtime routine for Joel, 17 months old, is to read a book in his room, rock in the glider for about 5 minutes and then lay him down in the crib awake. He talks to himself for awhile and then falls asleep. We "cried it out" with him around 4 months old and have been on this routine ever since.
2. What made you decide to promote your child out of a crib into a toddler bed? How did you guys go about doing that and getting them to stay in the bed?
I also promoted Samuel out of the crib b/c I needed it for Baby #2. We put a twin mattress on the floor in Samuel's room before Joel was born (he was about 17 months). We didn't ask him to sleep in it, we just wanted it to be there and have him get used to the idea. Eventually we asked him if he wanted to take his nap in it and he did (around 19 months). It went great. Over a period of two weeks we gave him the option of sleeping in his crib or his bed. He was about 50/50 in choosing. Then we moved to our new house and he had his new room with his big boy bed (he was 22 months). He slept in it fine and we've never looked back.
Now, as far as staying in bed - We didn't make it a rule that Samuel couldn't get out of bed on his own. When he is done sleeping, he gets out of bed and leaves his room - he can reach the door handle and open it himself. He comes downstairs by himself and finds me. He also gets up in the early morning sometimes and comes to sleep in our bed with us. This is fine with us, so I don't force him to go back to bed. I don't worry about Samuel falling down the stairs. BUT, once we move Joel upstairs, we will put in a baby gate in the hallway so that he can't get down the stairs by himself - he's still too little to be trusted.
My decision to move Joel from crib to bed won't be motivated by Baby #3 this time (no baby #3 for us yet!). We've bought a little toddler bed for him and have just set it up in Samuel's room. We've let Joel take one nap in it, but he woke up early and freaked out a bit. We'll try again in a few weeks. We would really like to have him up in his bed in Samuel's room by the time I have my next surgery (end of October and he will be 19 months old), so that we can have the nursery converted back to a guest room for my parents. But I realize that is a double transition - to a bed and to sharing a bedroom. I'll let you know how it goes.
Ask an Author...being motivated
Posted by |
at 10:22 PM
Here is another reader question, "Any tips for inspiration, motivation, etc? Any particular verses/passages/ Christian non-fiction that have impacted any of you in a big way in this area? I'm tired of feeling like I'm always behind, but more, I'm tired of feeling like my work within the home is a burden."
I know what it is like to have a hard time being motivated, especially as a mom. Many times it seems like we are spinning our wheels and getting nowhere. We do the laundry, clean the kitchen, wash the dishes and POOF! There are more dishes and more laundry. It truly seems like a woman’s work is never done! And, we think to ourselves, “If it never gets done, than why should I put forth so much effort to do it in the first place,” right? Well, I think the best remedy for this lack of motivation is to remember who we are working for! Cleaning the house (and doing other household chores) to please our husbands and children is certainly good. I want to make my home a comfortable place for the people I love and that is fine. But, we are also to do our best because the Lord asks us to (Colossians 3:23 is the first reference that comes to mind). Another way to look at working in the home is to remember that housework can be servanthood. John 13:12 says, “So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them, 'Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you. Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him. If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.'"
What if I look at housework as "washing feet"? That really changes my perspective! How dare I complain about cleaning up these wonderful children whom I love and who love me back! I have a great opportunity in my own home to be a servant to my husband and children and wash their feet, and this pleases the Lord only if I do it with a cheerful heart.
Now, how can we put this into practice and actually do our housework with a cheerful heart? I don’t have all the answers, but I recently finished reading a great book by Elizabeth George called, Life Management for Busy Women, Living Out God’s Plan with Passion and Purpose. It was excellent and she had a lot to say about organzing our lives so that we can serve the Lord and those in our families well. A few other small things that we can do to get motivated is to play lively and inspiring music while doing housework or to set a timer and clean for a specified amount of time (Leah mentioned this one in an earlier post). You’d be amazed how much you can accomplish in ten minutes when you are solely focused on one task! Hopefully these things will help. Pray and ask the Lord to help you be motivated to work diligently for Him and then roll up your sleeves and get started!
I know what it is like to have a hard time being motivated, especially as a mom. Many times it seems like we are spinning our wheels and getting nowhere. We do the laundry, clean the kitchen, wash the dishes and POOF! There are more dishes and more laundry. It truly seems like a woman’s work is never done! And, we think to ourselves, “If it never gets done, than why should I put forth so much effort to do it in the first place,” right? Well, I think the best remedy for this lack of motivation is to remember who we are working for! Cleaning the house (and doing other household chores) to please our husbands and children is certainly good. I want to make my home a comfortable place for the people I love and that is fine. But, we are also to do our best because the Lord asks us to (Colossians 3:23 is the first reference that comes to mind). Another way to look at working in the home is to remember that housework can be servanthood. John 13:12 says, “So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them, 'Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you. Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him. If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.'"
What if I look at housework as "washing feet"? That really changes my perspective! How dare I complain about cleaning up these wonderful children whom I love and who love me back! I have a great opportunity in my own home to be a servant to my husband and children and wash their feet, and this pleases the Lord only if I do it with a cheerful heart.
Now, how can we put this into practice and actually do our housework with a cheerful heart? I don’t have all the answers, but I recently finished reading a great book by Elizabeth George called, Life Management for Busy Women, Living Out God’s Plan with Passion and Purpose. It was excellent and she had a lot to say about organzing our lives so that we can serve the Lord and those in our families well. A few other small things that we can do to get motivated is to play lively and inspiring music while doing housework or to set a timer and clean for a specified amount of time (Leah mentioned this one in an earlier post). You’d be amazed how much you can accomplish in ten minutes when you are solely focused on one task! Hopefully these things will help. Pray and ask the Lord to help you be motivated to work diligently for Him and then roll up your sleeves and get started!
Ask An Author: Bedtimes
Posted by |
at 9:01 AM
Just wondering what kind of bedtime routine you all use to get your kids around this age to go to sleep! My 2 1/2 year old refuses to lay down in her bed by herself at night and go to sleep on her own. Once she is asleep...she stays that way all night, but it is a battle every night to get her to sleep.
I do think we have gone through periods where Will was more challenging at bedtime, but we have always try to stay consistent and not let the "I needs" take over. He knows what to expect at bedtime and rarely gets anymore. We do bath, pjs, bible story, song, prayer, lights out. It only takes about 20 minutes - less if we skip bath. He gets a stuffed animal - that stays on his bed so it always available for sleep - and music. We learned really quickly not to allow more than that...several days were spent searching for his Thomas the Train to sleep with him. I didn't want him to have a dependance on multiple items for sleeping or for him to think I'd search the house, car, diaper bag, etc. for that ONE toy he HAD to have.
I would say that if you have been clear about the bedtime routine and your expectations (that she stay in the bed) then it has become a defiance issue and needs disciplining as any other issue throughout the day. I would apply whatever disciplining you normally use to her refusal to obey your instructions at bedtime as well. If you're consistent, she will likely get the message that you mean business at bedtime as well as the rest of the day.
That said, we did go through a period around age 2.5 where Will did this at naptimes. I ended up having to remove all toys and books from his room everyday for naptime. Once I realized this was a becoming a BIG problem, I camped out next to his door (he didn't know this - I didn't tell him) and was able to immediately go in and correct him when he got out of bed. I still have a monitor in his room now so I can listen for him playing instead of sleeping and its simply something I decided not to allow in our house. He may quietly sing to his music, but no toys in bed during sleep times.
What made you decide to promote your child out of a crib into a toddler bed? How did you guys go about doing that and getting them to stay in the bed?
I needed the crib for baby #2! I did not transition Will out of the crib until around his second birthday. His sister was 3 months old and needed the crib. One day, we put the toddler bed together in his room. We let him see it for a day or two and talk about how it was his new bed. The next day, he asked to nap in it and did! I just told him he was to stay in bed and not to get out unless Mommy or Daddy came to get him. I left his crib in there for another day or so but he was fine and transitioned very easily. One thing we did do was put one of those safety knob covers over his door knob. This way he could not open his door and get out by himself. (I honestly don't think he's ever tried though!) It also prevents him from locking the door from the inside.
I think a lot of times we underestimate how flexible and adaptable kids are. We assume the transitions will be hard - and sometimes just assuming that ourselves makes them harder than they have to be!
I do think we have gone through periods where Will was more challenging at bedtime, but we have always try to stay consistent and not let the "I needs" take over. He knows what to expect at bedtime and rarely gets anymore. We do bath, pjs, bible story, song, prayer, lights out. It only takes about 20 minutes - less if we skip bath. He gets a stuffed animal - that stays on his bed so it always available for sleep - and music. We learned really quickly not to allow more than that...several days were spent searching for his Thomas the Train to sleep with him. I didn't want him to have a dependance on multiple items for sleeping or for him to think I'd search the house, car, diaper bag, etc. for that ONE toy he HAD to have.
I would say that if you have been clear about the bedtime routine and your expectations (that she stay in the bed) then it has become a defiance issue and needs disciplining as any other issue throughout the day. I would apply whatever disciplining you normally use to her refusal to obey your instructions at bedtime as well. If you're consistent, she will likely get the message that you mean business at bedtime as well as the rest of the day.
That said, we did go through a period around age 2.5 where Will did this at naptimes. I ended up having to remove all toys and books from his room everyday for naptime. Once I realized this was a becoming a BIG problem, I camped out next to his door (he didn't know this - I didn't tell him) and was able to immediately go in and correct him when he got out of bed. I still have a monitor in his room now so I can listen for him playing instead of sleeping and its simply something I decided not to allow in our house. He may quietly sing to his music, but no toys in bed during sleep times.
What made you decide to promote your child out of a crib into a toddler bed? How did you guys go about doing that and getting them to stay in the bed?
I needed the crib for baby #2! I did not transition Will out of the crib until around his second birthday. His sister was 3 months old and needed the crib. One day, we put the toddler bed together in his room. We let him see it for a day or two and talk about how it was his new bed. The next day, he asked to nap in it and did! I just told him he was to stay in bed and not to get out unless Mommy or Daddy came to get him. I left his crib in there for another day or so but he was fine and transitioned very easily. One thing we did do was put one of those safety knob covers over his door knob. This way he could not open his door and get out by himself. (I honestly don't think he's ever tried though!) It also prevents him from locking the door from the inside.
I think a lot of times we underestimate how flexible and adaptable kids are. We assume the transitions will be hard - and sometimes just assuming that ourselves makes them harder than they have to be!
4 in 5
Posted by | Wednesday, August 19, 2009 at 9:10 AM
Kate 4, Owen 2 1/2, Zane 8 mo, Liam 5 1/2 Hi, my name is Jen and I had my 4 kids within 5 years. My first, Liam, was 16 months old when my second, Kate, was born. Liam was almost 3 and Kate was 19 months old when Owen was born. (We had 3 under three for about a month.) We waited for a while to add a forth little joy to our family because Owen had many medical problems that consumed a lot of his first year and a half of his life. When my forth, Zane, was born Liam was almost 5, Kate 3 1/2 and Owen was 22 months old.
I have to say there are definite moments of craziness, but mostly it has worked out well for us. We did hope to have our children all close together in age, despite what all the "You do know what causes that?" comments we've received imply. There were several families we knew and really admired who had done it that way. Their kids were great friends, going through all the stages of life together—toddlerhood, elementary, high school, etc. While you're doing diapers you might as well "really do diapers" right? My siblings were more spaced out and I feel like my brother and I had a completely different growing-up experience than my younger two sisters who were 6 and 9 years younger than me. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but my husband and I desired the closeness of being close in age for our kids.
And of course all of the above sounds well and good if it were really our choice. Our lives and our family are in God's hands. His plan may not be our plan. His ways are higher than our ways. Whether you struggle with infertility, have an "unplanned" pregnancy, lose a child, or just don't agree on spacing, in the end your family will be exactly as God intended.
Are we done? That waits to be seen. But right now this stage in life is keeping us busy. I wouldn't trade it for the world. Like the other ladies have said, the kids play great together (most of the time) and they really are each other's best friends. I don't know if it will always be that way, but all through life they will always have each other.
Right now I have 2 in diapers, buckle 3 carseats, carry one (or two) into the library, have a line of small children holding hands across the parking lot, cut up food for 2, have 3 sleeping in the same bedroom with the same bedtime, often have 3 napping simultaneously and bathe my children every night. Okay that last one isn't true. They're lucky if they get a bath once a week.
I think the trick to having many small children is realizing you have many small children. That means tempering your expectations. You aren't going to get anywhere fast. You are going to be knee deep in diapers and laundry. You are going to have times they are all crying at once. You aren't going to be able to do everything, and that's okay, because there will be other times you feel like the luckiest woman in the world.
Is 4 kids 5 and under doable? Definitely.
Like they always say, "They grow up way too fast." I'm just one mom trying to cherish the moments.
Wordless Wednesday...
Posted by |
at 5:00 AM
How Deep....How Wide....Is His love for me!!
(Taken at the Red Sea)
My boys are 19 months apart
Posted by |
at 12:20 AM
My two boys are 19 months apart - Joel is 17 months old and Samuel will be 3 on Saturday. Having two close together is a lot of work. Well, I should say was a lot of work, because it is getting much easier as Joel gets older. Samuel was just 19 months old when Joel was born. That meant I had two in diapers, two boys to get in and out of the car, two schedules to manage and, finally, align. I know there were many days when I thought, "oh, man, life would be so much easier with just one child." One example is that I had Samuel in a gymnastics class. I am lucky enough to have a husband home during the day, so he could keep the baby. If I didn't have him, it would have been really hard to have Samuel in the class. It can be exhausting lugging a baby around to all of your toddler's activities. But I am now seeing all of the benefits of having two close together. Joel has changed from a baby to a toddler. The boys can play together for a long time and keep each other entertained. They are now on the same schedule, so I get the same quiet time during the day and evening. They are similar in size and can share a lot of their clothes. I love having "my boys". I look forward to watching them grow up together. They will only be one grade apart in school. They will be each other's best friend and they bring our family so much joy. There is nothing better than sitting at the dinner table together, laughing and laughing at what the boys have come up with. I wouldn't change having two close together for the world. Yes, there is a lot of work to do initially, but then you get over the baby phase and can move on to the next phase of life.
Ask an Author...Children born close together
Posted by | Tuesday, August 18, 2009 at 10:20 PM
We received this question from a reader, "You all have small children. Who has children closest in age and how does that work out more than one little one?"
Several of us have children that were all born at nearly the same time. My two kids are eighteen months apart. Actually, I found the transition from one to two children relatively easy (of course, the first few weeks are always a little rough no matter how many children you have). We already had a schedule with our first, and I’ve done all I can to work our second child into that schedule. Now, she is three and he is eighteen months and they nap at the same time and go to bed at the same time. We can also read stories together and they play together wonderfully (most of the time). I wouldn’t change one thing about the way it has worked out. I love having them close together and it seems like they do too!
Several of us have children that were all born at nearly the same time. My two kids are eighteen months apart. Actually, I found the transition from one to two children relatively easy (of course, the first few weeks are always a little rough no matter how many children you have). We already had a schedule with our first, and I’ve done all I can to work our second child into that schedule. Now, she is three and he is eighteen months and they nap at the same time and go to bed at the same time. We can also read stories together and they play together wonderfully (most of the time). I wouldn’t change one thing about the way it has worked out. I love having them close together and it seems like they do too!
Ask an Author. . .Making Bread
Posted by |
at 12:00 AM
Keri asked what got me started milling my own wheat and what resources I could recommend to get started. Great question! I started milling my own wheat because I learned that unmilled flour was rancid (90% of the nutrients are oxidized within 72 hours of milling) as well as stripped of the nutritients that God put in that kernal of grain (bran and germ are removed, leaving the endosperm which is processed by your body as sugar). A friend of mine showed me her mill and how easy it was and I was sold. For more information on the health benefits of milling your own wheat, please check out another post I wrote on making bread.
As far as resources to get started, I bought my bread and most supplies through a Breadbeckers coop. I definitely recommend a coop if you can find one because shipping is so much cheaper.
As far as resources to get started, I bought my bread and most supplies through a Breadbeckers coop. I definitely recommend a coop if you can find one because shipping is so much cheaper.
Ask and Author: Meeting Our Hubbies
Posted by | Monday, August 17, 2009 at 7:08 AM
Leah
I actually first met my husband Ed when I was 16 and he was 23! Back in 1997, the Lord had been working in each of our lives. We both came to know the Lord that year and both joined the same church family. I was a teenager, however, and Ed was an older college student. I remember him getting baptized. I mostly remember him from the nursery - I was a nursery worker and he would come pick up a little boy each week. I thought it was his son! Turns out it was the son of a friend of his. Ed came along with our church youth group as a "chaperone" when we went to Mexico for my Senior Year spring break trip. I got to know him a little more then as our group spent the week working together. That summer, I went to a Christian festival with a group of college students before I went off to college and Ed was there. We had a fun time together from what I remember.
Shortly after I started my freshman year of college, my mom saw Ed in the hallway at church and he asked how I was doing. She told him I was pretty homesick and that he should give me a call sometime to see how I was doing (looking back, she had no idea what she was starting!). Ed called me then and we started what would be a four year, long-distance friendship. We kept in touch through phone calls and e-mails, as well as mutual visits home to my hometown/his college town throughout the four years of my schooling. We both dated other people, went on extended overseas trips, and grew a lot during those four years. But we always came back to talking with one another and valuing the friendship we had.
I didn't think I was interested in him romantically...until Thanksgiving of my Senior year in college. A group of us were all back in town and decided to go out bowling. There was a new girl at church that went along with us to. I watched as she flirted with Ed all night long. They even decided to go out for a cup of coffee after everyone parted ways. A jealousy surged through me like I'd never known before! Ed was MY friend - WE were always the ones to sneak off for a cup of coffee after everyone said goodbye. God put me face to face with the fact that I wanted more out of our relationship than I had previously admitted to myself. We had so many good talks between Thanksgiving and Christmas of that year and decided to try dating. We were instantly in love. All those years of friendship had laid such excellent groundwork for a loving, committed relationship. We got engaged that October and said "I do" by December. I am so pleased to be married to such a wonderful man, my best friend.
Margaret
Ben and I met six years ago when we were both in our final semesters in college. We had the same class on the Civil War. Ben was (and is) very frugal and didn’t pay the university parking fee and had to park very, very far away from campus. I saw him walking back to his car after class one day and offered him a ride to his car. We were able to talk and he invited me out to lunch. We were married just over one year later. The odd thing is that even though we both attended a major university, our families were both from the same town and our moms actually went to high school together!
Christina
Jacob and I met on New Years Eve of 2000 at a Christmas Conference with Campus Crusade. Prior to this, we had many mutual friends and knew of each other but had yet to meet before this. Our sophomore year of college we traveled to Slovakia twice together with Campus Crusade. Once with a small team at spring break and for 8 weeks over the summer. Our friendship continued to develop and by the end of the summer, we both liked the other. It wasn't until October that we sat down and actually talked about our relationship. (This was in part, thanks to my roomate Lisa having a little chat with Jacob to put the pressure on him to step up or back off! Thanks, Lis. ) So, in October, Jacob said he wasn't ready and that we should probably stop spending so much time together. I was disappointed, but had a peace because I already sensed that we would end up together again at some point. Three months later, in January he called me and asked if I would be coming to hear him sing at a concert (he sang in an accapella group in college) and of course I was. Afterwards, we had a little chat followed by our first (official) date that weekend! We dated for two years before getting engaged in January of 2004 and married in October 2004.
Hollie
Hugh and I met in college (North Georgia College and State University to be exact), and for four years (1996-2000) we were only friends. I wasn't attracted to him, he wasn't attracted to me. Truly JUST friends. He graduated and went on to SE Asia to be a Journeyman for two years (2001-2003). I DID NOT graduate, due to the fact that I changed my major to Spanish after my Junior year (go figure), so I graduated a year later (Dec 2001). Around ten months into Hugh's first year in SE ASIA (Octoberish), I started thinking about him in a different light, but didn't tell anyone. I simply journaled about him and prayed to the Lord about him, but didn't tell a soul. We did keep in touch via email and chat, which was the highlight of every day.
In December 2001, a year into his overseas career and right around the time I graduated from college, he mentioned to me about his two-week leave to come home that he was going to take in January, and he asked me out on a date! The coolest part to this whole story was that there was no middle man doing the set-up. The Lord opened our eyes to each other while being worlds apart. He came home in January, and although it was a little strange to see your previous "buddy" in a new light, those two weeks were dreamy. He still had another year in SE Asia, so although I was attracted to him, I didn't want to put an expectation or label on our relationship.
Hugh returned to Asia, and I became an intern at our BSU for six months. Fast-forward to six months to June. At the end of my internship, my roommate from college, Liz Stewart, invited me to go on a mission trip with New Orleans Seminary (since the leading prof already knew who I was) to the exact city where Hugh was living. There was an empty spot on the team just two weeks before they left. I didn't have a teaching job yet, so I jumped on it...but the deal was, Hugh was supposed to be out of town leading another team on a hiking trip almost the whole time we were going to be there, minus a day or two. I knew that going into the trip. He had NO IDEA I was coming. A day or two before we arrived, his supervisor slipped up and accidentally told Hugh that I was coming. To sum this up, he found a replacement for a portion of the the time he was to be away, so I was able to see him some while there.
The Lord did an amazing work in our relationship, and honestly, had we not been able to bridge that long waiting time, I don't know if we would have made it. I was able to see the people he worked among and his heart for the Nations. He was so excited to share it all with me as well. The Lord knew just what we needed. He came home six months later (Jan 2003), while I was teaching High School Spanish. Eight months later on Sept 16, 2003, we were engaged! Six and a half months of engagement and then married April 3, 2004!
I actually first met my husband Ed when I was 16 and he was 23! Back in 1997, the Lord had been working in each of our lives. We both came to know the Lord that year and both joined the same church family. I was a teenager, however, and Ed was an older college student. I remember him getting baptized. I mostly remember him from the nursery - I was a nursery worker and he would come pick up a little boy each week. I thought it was his son! Turns out it was the son of a friend of his. Ed came along with our church youth group as a "chaperone" when we went to Mexico for my Senior Year spring break trip. I got to know him a little more then as our group spent the week working together. That summer, I went to a Christian festival with a group of college students before I went off to college and Ed was there. We had a fun time together from what I remember.
Shortly after I started my freshman year of college, my mom saw Ed in the hallway at church and he asked how I was doing. She told him I was pretty homesick and that he should give me a call sometime to see how I was doing (looking back, she had no idea what she was starting!). Ed called me then and we started what would be a four year, long-distance friendship. We kept in touch through phone calls and e-mails, as well as mutual visits home to my hometown/his college town throughout the four years of my schooling. We both dated other people, went on extended overseas trips, and grew a lot during those four years. But we always came back to talking with one another and valuing the friendship we had.
I didn't think I was interested in him romantically...until Thanksgiving of my Senior year in college. A group of us were all back in town and decided to go out bowling. There was a new girl at church that went along with us to. I watched as she flirted with Ed all night long. They even decided to go out for a cup of coffee after everyone parted ways. A jealousy surged through me like I'd never known before! Ed was MY friend - WE were always the ones to sneak off for a cup of coffee after everyone said goodbye. God put me face to face with the fact that I wanted more out of our relationship than I had previously admitted to myself. We had so many good talks between Thanksgiving and Christmas of that year and decided to try dating. We were instantly in love. All those years of friendship had laid such excellent groundwork for a loving, committed relationship. We got engaged that October and said "I do" by December. I am so pleased to be married to such a wonderful man, my best friend.
Margaret
Ben and I met six years ago when we were both in our final semesters in college. We had the same class on the Civil War. Ben was (and is) very frugal and didn’t pay the university parking fee and had to park very, very far away from campus. I saw him walking back to his car after class one day and offered him a ride to his car. We were able to talk and he invited me out to lunch. We were married just over one year later. The odd thing is that even though we both attended a major university, our families were both from the same town and our moms actually went to high school together!
Christina
Jacob and I met on New Years Eve of 2000 at a Christmas Conference with Campus Crusade. Prior to this, we had many mutual friends and knew of each other but had yet to meet before this. Our sophomore year of college we traveled to Slovakia twice together with Campus Crusade. Once with a small team at spring break and for 8 weeks over the summer. Our friendship continued to develop and by the end of the summer, we both liked the other. It wasn't until October that we sat down and actually talked about our relationship. (This was in part, thanks to my roomate Lisa having a little chat with Jacob to put the pressure on him to step up or back off! Thanks, Lis. ) So, in October, Jacob said he wasn't ready and that we should probably stop spending so much time together. I was disappointed, but had a peace because I already sensed that we would end up together again at some point. Three months later, in January he called me and asked if I would be coming to hear him sing at a concert (he sang in an accapella group in college) and of course I was. Afterwards, we had a little chat followed by our first (official) date that weekend! We dated for two years before getting engaged in January of 2004 and married in October 2004.
Hollie
Hugh and I met in college (North Georgia College and State University to be exact), and for four years (1996-2000) we were only friends. I wasn't attracted to him, he wasn't attracted to me. Truly JUST friends. He graduated and went on to SE Asia to be a Journeyman for two years (2001-2003). I DID NOT graduate, due to the fact that I changed my major to Spanish after my Junior year (go figure), so I graduated a year later (Dec 2001). Around ten months into Hugh's first year in SE ASIA (Octoberish), I started thinking about him in a different light, but didn't tell anyone. I simply journaled about him and prayed to the Lord about him, but didn't tell a soul. We did keep in touch via email and chat, which was the highlight of every day.
In December 2001, a year into his overseas career and right around the time I graduated from college, he mentioned to me about his two-week leave to come home that he was going to take in January, and he asked me out on a date! The coolest part to this whole story was that there was no middle man doing the set-up. The Lord opened our eyes to each other while being worlds apart. He came home in January, and although it was a little strange to see your previous "buddy" in a new light, those two weeks were dreamy. He still had another year in SE Asia, so although I was attracted to him, I didn't want to put an expectation or label on our relationship.
Hugh returned to Asia, and I became an intern at our BSU for six months. Fast-forward to six months to June. At the end of my internship, my roommate from college, Liz Stewart, invited me to go on a mission trip with New Orleans Seminary (since the leading prof already knew who I was) to the exact city where Hugh was living. There was an empty spot on the team just two weeks before they left. I didn't have a teaching job yet, so I jumped on it...but the deal was, Hugh was supposed to be out of town leading another team on a hiking trip almost the whole time we were going to be there, minus a day or two. I knew that going into the trip. He had NO IDEA I was coming. A day or two before we arrived, his supervisor slipped up and accidentally told Hugh that I was coming. To sum this up, he found a replacement for a portion of the the time he was to be away, so I was able to see him some while there.
The Lord did an amazing work in our relationship, and honestly, had we not been able to bridge that long waiting time, I don't know if we would have made it. I was able to see the people he worked among and his heart for the Nations. He was so excited to share it all with me as well. The Lord knew just what we needed. He came home six months later (Jan 2003), while I was teaching High School Spanish. Eight months later on Sept 16, 2003, we were engaged! Six and a half months of engagement and then married April 3, 2004!
Ask an Author...Overseas transitions
Posted by |
at 5:00 AM
One of our readers, Melissa asked if Krista and I could share about when we arrived initially overseas, our culture shock, language learning,, cooking, etc… Melissa, I am so glad you asked! Here’s some of our story of initial arrival and culture shock. I hope Krista will share her story! She’s a great overseas wife and mom and has a lot of wisdom in mommying and cooking!!
My husband and I planned to move overseas for 2 years but didn’t know where we were going until a year before we left. As soon as we knew where we were going we started reading, studying, and asking a lot of questions about our country. I found someone who lived in the city where we were moving and I drove her nuts with emails of questions! She was so gracious to answer all of my silly questions! We were prepared as anyone could be beforehand but nothing can completely prepare you for everything that you will go through in the first several months of living in your new home.
I remember arriving at around 10 pm in the airport in our country with our 3 children (then 10, 4, and 3), 19 suitcases and boxes, 5 carry-ons, 2 computer bags and a brain that was in complete “fog mode!” We were greeted by some sweet people who took us straight to our apartment. They had put some eggs, juice, milk and bread in our kitchen and handed us a pan of brownies and said, “Call us when you wake up or when you decide you need something.”
When we shut the door, I turned around to see what looked to me like an impossible place to make home:
The ceramic floor was white and black checked, the room was LINED with huge floral chairs, the couch and love seat were turquoise leather, the THREE chandeliers in the living area were atrocious green metal leaf/tree type structures, 10 sconces that matched the chandeliers and the walls were caked in nicotine! Our children were standing there with their carry-ons still strapped on, the 19 pieces of luggage were piled all around, and I looked at my husband and thought, “Oh my! What have we done?!” At this point none of my homework paid off except that I knew this is where we were supposed to be and God would guide us.
After a crazy night’s sleep (children up and down throwing up and not knowing where they were) we woke up to tackle what was ahead of us. We had no toilet paper so purchasing that was first on the agenda. At that point I told Matt, “YOU go! I am NOT going out there! It’s scary!” So, he and Madison volunteered to go toilet paper hunting! They returned a few minutes later with a favorable report: “Honey, we live on top of a mall! The people are so nice! They gave Madison candy and everyone touched her hair! And look…I found toilet paper, right in our building!” Of course, I was impressed with the mall possibility but while they had been gone I was discovering how much work it was going to take to make my apartment homey.
At that point something in me flipped and I went into “make this house a home” mode! For the next three months I was a mad woman! I went out just about every night (when stores are open here) after I put the kids to bed and looked and shopped and shopped. I didn’t care that I didn’t know anyone or didn’t know the language. I was just determined to have a place that was homey in the middle of a city, language and people that was so foreign.
I succeeded in making our apartment a place that we call home but…
Then another switch flipped….the culture shock switch. At about the 3 month mark, I decided that I had had enough and I was ready to go back to America. I didn’t want to go out of the house, I was afraid to talk to people and I didn’t want to use any language that I had learned up to that point. I had been warned of the signs of culture shock and knew that I was in the middle of it but the reality of it was a terrible feeling. God was so good in allowing Matt and I to experience culture shock at different times (his didn’t happen until a few months later) because we were there for each other during some very difficult times. We went through feelings of uselessness, anger toward our new culture, language frustrations, and mourning of things WE missed for our children (their grandparents, friends, a yard, church programs). The initial culture shock did end but I will say that it does come and go every now and then…but less frequently for sure! The only things that get me through those times are clinging to verses that I have made a list of before, the support of my husband, God’s call on our lives and prayer.
My post is already way too long and I only wrote about our initial entry and culture shock!! So, I will just leave you with the verses that carry me through some of the most difficult days of my life….but it is OH SO WORTH IT!
Colossians 1:29
Matthew 6:25-34
Psalm 55:22
Philippians 4:6-9, 19 (Don’t panic, don’t be paralyzed, PRAY)
Melissa, I prayed for you as I wrote this post: Dear Jesus, I pray for Melissa and her family right now…as they prepare to move overseas. I thank you for your promise to go before us and to come behind us…I thank you for your calling on our lives. I pray for all of the details and last minute things she and her husband must do…give them wisdom and grace in decisions they must make. I pray for the teary good –byes that must be said to their families…allow the pain to be minimal in the light of your glory. I pray for the new friends that they will make in their new country, for their entry, for their adjustment….God, pour out your grace and glory upon all that they think, do and say! May You, Jesus be glorified in all things!
My husband and I planned to move overseas for 2 years but didn’t know where we were going until a year before we left. As soon as we knew where we were going we started reading, studying, and asking a lot of questions about our country. I found someone who lived in the city where we were moving and I drove her nuts with emails of questions! She was so gracious to answer all of my silly questions! We were prepared as anyone could be beforehand but nothing can completely prepare you for everything that you will go through in the first several months of living in your new home.
I remember arriving at around 10 pm in the airport in our country with our 3 children (then 10, 4, and 3), 19 suitcases and boxes, 5 carry-ons, 2 computer bags and a brain that was in complete “fog mode!” We were greeted by some sweet people who took us straight to our apartment. They had put some eggs, juice, milk and bread in our kitchen and handed us a pan of brownies and said, “Call us when you wake up or when you decide you need something.”
When we shut the door, I turned around to see what looked to me like an impossible place to make home:
The ceramic floor was white and black checked, the room was LINED with huge floral chairs, the couch and love seat were turquoise leather, the THREE chandeliers in the living area were atrocious green metal leaf/tree type structures, 10 sconces that matched the chandeliers and the walls were caked in nicotine! Our children were standing there with their carry-ons still strapped on, the 19 pieces of luggage were piled all around, and I looked at my husband and thought, “Oh my! What have we done?!” At this point none of my homework paid off except that I knew this is where we were supposed to be and God would guide us.
After a crazy night’s sleep (children up and down throwing up and not knowing where they were) we woke up to tackle what was ahead of us. We had no toilet paper so purchasing that was first on the agenda. At that point I told Matt, “YOU go! I am NOT going out there! It’s scary!” So, he and Madison volunteered to go toilet paper hunting! They returned a few minutes later with a favorable report: “Honey, we live on top of a mall! The people are so nice! They gave Madison candy and everyone touched her hair! And look…I found toilet paper, right in our building!” Of course, I was impressed with the mall possibility but while they had been gone I was discovering how much work it was going to take to make my apartment homey.
At that point something in me flipped and I went into “make this house a home” mode! For the next three months I was a mad woman! I went out just about every night (when stores are open here) after I put the kids to bed and looked and shopped and shopped. I didn’t care that I didn’t know anyone or didn’t know the language. I was just determined to have a place that was homey in the middle of a city, language and people that was so foreign.
I succeeded in making our apartment a place that we call home but…
Then another switch flipped….the culture shock switch. At about the 3 month mark, I decided that I had had enough and I was ready to go back to America. I didn’t want to go out of the house, I was afraid to talk to people and I didn’t want to use any language that I had learned up to that point. I had been warned of the signs of culture shock and knew that I was in the middle of it but the reality of it was a terrible feeling. God was so good in allowing Matt and I to experience culture shock at different times (his didn’t happen until a few months later) because we were there for each other during some very difficult times. We went through feelings of uselessness, anger toward our new culture, language frustrations, and mourning of things WE missed for our children (their grandparents, friends, a yard, church programs). The initial culture shock did end but I will say that it does come and go every now and then…but less frequently for sure! The only things that get me through those times are clinging to verses that I have made a list of before, the support of my husband, God’s call on our lives and prayer.
My post is already way too long and I only wrote about our initial entry and culture shock!! So, I will just leave you with the verses that carry me through some of the most difficult days of my life….but it is OH SO WORTH IT!
Colossians 1:29
Matthew 6:25-34
Psalm 55:22
Philippians 4:6-9, 19 (Don’t panic, don’t be paralyzed, PRAY)
Melissa, I prayed for you as I wrote this post: Dear Jesus, I pray for Melissa and her family right now…as they prepare to move overseas. I thank you for your promise to go before us and to come behind us…I thank you for your calling on our lives. I pray for all of the details and last minute things she and her husband must do…give them wisdom and grace in decisions they must make. I pray for the teary good –byes that must be said to their families…allow the pain to be minimal in the light of your glory. I pray for the new friends that they will make in their new country, for their entry, for their adjustment….God, pour out your grace and glory upon all that they think, do and say! May You, Jesus be glorified in all things!
Stroller Swapping
Posted by | Friday, August 14, 2009 at 8:00 AM
Some people collect stamps or baseball cards...apparently, I collect strollers. Well, not really collect because I certainly haven't owned all of these at one time. But we have owned 11 different strollers at one time or another over the past 3 years. You might think I'm crazy - I know Leah does - but I would say that between buying used (we love Craigslist like Leah!) and reselling, we've hardly lost any money on my "collection." Basically, we swap one for another!
A good stroller is worth its weight in gold and I've been a quest since day 1 to find a good stroller! One thing I've learned is that there is no perfect stroller, but some come close. Many are good for one purpose, but not another. I've also learned that the most expensive is not ALWAYS the best, but sometimes it is. :)
Before I continue - a favorite website of mine, Baby Cheapskate, has compiled a HUGE list of stroller ratings from Mom's just like us. Check it out if you're in the market for a new (or new-to-you) stroller!
Here is a quick rundown of strollers we have owned and my thoughts on each. I've linked each one so you can see what it looks like.
Peg Perego Aria - not worth the money, didn't roll straight, hard to maneuver, received as gift and used for first 9 (?) months of Will's life.
Graco Metrolite - good value for the money - used for overseas travel - lightweight - bought used on CL and resold for same amount shortly after our trip. :)
Graco Duoglider - did not like it, could hardly push around our hilly neighborhood while carrying infant carseat and lightweight 2 year old, very bulky and took up entire back of van! Bought new on clearance at BRU when pregnant with #2. Sold it pretty quickly, but did buy another used one just for our trip to Disney in January. Worked well for the crazy Disney crowds. Resold for same price after trip!
Baby Trend Expedition single jogger - good value for the money, great for walks around neighborhood when Will was young. Bought new when Will was young and used until Adeline came. Sold to Shannon C. via CL. What did you think, Shannon!?
Graco snugrider frame - GREAT alternative to large travel system stroller. Received as a gift and LOVE it! Have used it for both Will and Adeline while they used the infant carseat. Still have it waiting for more babies. :)
Graco Mosaic - great middle ground between umbrella and full size Graco. Sort of an upgraded umbrella stroller - folds like an umbrella, but has large basket and holds Graco infant seat. Rolled and maneuverd well! Bought on clearance at Target and used for over 2 years.
Graco Quattro Tour - large, bulky, but rolls great because of the large wheels - only had for a short time, downsized for smaller Graco Metrolite for oversea travel. Bought used off CL.
BOB revolution duallie - ALL TIME FAVORITE. Nothing compares to how easily this stroller is maneuvered. Can literally push and steer with one pinky. Can hold infant seat. Bought new (20% off at REI) when Adeline was 2 months old?
Chicco Capri- great, great upscale umbrella stroller w/ basket and 5 point harness - SECOND FAV. Wish they made a double stroller like this single one!
Chicco Trevvi Twin double umbrella - didn't like - bought on clearance at BRU to replace the duoglider after Adeline was born. VERY hard to open and close. Only owned for about 6 months.
Joovy Caboose - like the style (sit and stand) and the fact that it is a front/back (versus side by side), but very heavy and squeaky. Hard to maneuver and possibly finding a replacement for soon - at my husbands request! Originally bought off ebay for 50% the cost at BRU.
We currently own four - BOB, Joovy, Chicco capri and the Graco Snugrider frame. Because I keep another 18 month old during the week, a good double stroller is imperative for outings with all three kids. We use the BOB for long outings like the zoo or neighborhood walks. We use the Joovy for quick trips - I can actually get all three kids on this one! The two girls sit strapped in and Will stands in front of the girl in the back. The Chicco is mainly used when we just need Adeline in a stroller and Will is ok to walk.
Adeline in the Chicco during a trip the NC Aquarium. We LOVE this stroller. You can see how easily the diaper bag hangs on it as well.
And the BOB works as a pumpkin cart as well as double stroller. We (even my super-frugal husband) LOVE our BOB and have never regretted the money spent on this stroller.
A good stroller is worth its weight in gold and I've been a quest since day 1 to find a good stroller! One thing I've learned is that there is no perfect stroller, but some come close. Many are good for one purpose, but not another. I've also learned that the most expensive is not ALWAYS the best, but sometimes it is. :)
Before I continue - a favorite website of mine, Baby Cheapskate, has compiled a HUGE list of stroller ratings from Mom's just like us. Check it out if you're in the market for a new (or new-to-you) stroller!
Here is a quick rundown of strollers we have owned and my thoughts on each. I've linked each one so you can see what it looks like.
Peg Perego Aria - not worth the money, didn't roll straight, hard to maneuver, received as gift and used for first 9 (?) months of Will's life.
Graco Metrolite - good value for the money - used for overseas travel - lightweight - bought used on CL and resold for same amount shortly after our trip. :)
Graco Duoglider - did not like it, could hardly push around our hilly neighborhood while carrying infant carseat and lightweight 2 year old, very bulky and took up entire back of van! Bought new on clearance at BRU when pregnant with #2. Sold it pretty quickly, but did buy another used one just for our trip to Disney in January. Worked well for the crazy Disney crowds. Resold for same price after trip!
Baby Trend Expedition single jogger - good value for the money, great for walks around neighborhood when Will was young. Bought new when Will was young and used until Adeline came. Sold to Shannon C. via CL. What did you think, Shannon!?
Graco snugrider frame - GREAT alternative to large travel system stroller. Received as a gift and LOVE it! Have used it for both Will and Adeline while they used the infant carseat. Still have it waiting for more babies. :)
Graco Mosaic - great middle ground between umbrella and full size Graco. Sort of an upgraded umbrella stroller - folds like an umbrella, but has large basket and holds Graco infant seat. Rolled and maneuverd well! Bought on clearance at Target and used for over 2 years.
Graco Quattro Tour - large, bulky, but rolls great because of the large wheels - only had for a short time, downsized for smaller Graco Metrolite for oversea travel. Bought used off CL.
BOB revolution duallie - ALL TIME FAVORITE. Nothing compares to how easily this stroller is maneuvered. Can literally push and steer with one pinky. Can hold infant seat. Bought new (20% off at REI) when Adeline was 2 months old?
Chicco Capri- great, great upscale umbrella stroller w/ basket and 5 point harness - SECOND FAV. Wish they made a double stroller like this single one!
Chicco Trevvi Twin double umbrella - didn't like - bought on clearance at BRU to replace the duoglider after Adeline was born. VERY hard to open and close. Only owned for about 6 months.
Joovy Caboose - like the style (sit and stand) and the fact that it is a front/back (versus side by side), but very heavy and squeaky. Hard to maneuver and possibly finding a replacement for soon - at my husbands request! Originally bought off ebay for 50% the cost at BRU.
We currently own four - BOB, Joovy, Chicco capri and the Graco Snugrider frame. Because I keep another 18 month old during the week, a good double stroller is imperative for outings with all three kids. We use the BOB for long outings like the zoo or neighborhood walks. We use the Joovy for quick trips - I can actually get all three kids on this one! The two girls sit strapped in and Will stands in front of the girl in the back. The Chicco is mainly used when we just need Adeline in a stroller and Will is ok to walk.
The Graco Duoglider that we bought/sold just for our Disney trip. The huge basket was great for the day in Disney. The reclining backseat was (in theory) great for naps for 9 month old Adeline.
Adeline in the Chicco during a trip the NC Aquarium. We LOVE this stroller. You can see how easily the diaper bag hangs on it as well.
And the BOB works as a pumpkin cart as well as double stroller. We (even my super-frugal husband) LOVE our BOB and have never regretted the money spent on this stroller.This post is dedicated to former president, George W. Bush and his stimulus package. Without which, we would not own our beloved BOB. I would also like to thank my husband for being so supportive of my "stroller swapping."
Strollers: Using Hand-me-downs and Craigslist
Posted by | Thursday, August 13, 2009 at 8:00 AM
Hi Ladies. My post today is for an alternative take on strollers. I say this because I am one of the few people who didn't register for a stroller when I had my babies. I used a baby sling and/or carried my baby for the first four months of his life. I made this decision for a few reasons: 1) I didn't want to spend the money on a new stroller, 2) I wanted to have the closeness to my infant, and 3) Ed and/or I really enjoyed carrying him. We finally started using a stroller some when someone gave us a hand-me-down when Samuel was 4 months old. It was an Eddie Bauer three-wheeled stroller, but it was missing the part to attach an infant carrier. We would stroll him around the neighborhood every now and again, but I was still almost exclusively using the sling.
It wasn't until Samuel was over a year old that I started pushing him places in a stroller. I was pregnant with Joel shortly thereafter and found the Eddie Bauer stroller to be sufficient. We still own this stroller today.
Once Joel was born, I again put him in a baby sling to go places. I would sling Joel and push Samuel in the stroller if we were going to the park or someplace like that. Once Joel was a few months old, I purchased a Baby Trend Sit N' Stand stroller for $40 off of Craigslist. Samuel was only about 20 months old at this point and too little for the sit/stand option he was supposed to use. BUT, Ed and I figured out that you could position our Graco Infant Carrier in the back portion of the Sit N' Stand with complete security. We would put Joel back there and have Samuel ride up front. We used the stroller this way until Joel was over a year old (at this point he wasn't using an infant carrier as a carseat - just as a seat in the stroller). Now Samuel is old enough to ride in the back on the sit/stand part and Joel rides up front. I like this stroller a lot - especially for the price.
We also recently purchased the cheapest ($15) stroller from Walmart over vacation and we use that sometimes to push just Joel down the street while Samuel walks alongside or if Ed wants to take just one of the boys somewhere. We like this stroller just fine as well.
All of this is to say that fancy, top-of-the line strollers aren't for everyone. I'm very happy with the strollers we've had and the money we've saved by not using one.
Phil and Teds Stroller
Posted by | Monday, August 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
This week we are talking about strollers. When I found out I was pregnant with twins, I realized I was going to need a better stroller than my Graco Mosaic umbrella stroller we currently used ie - I was going to need another set of hands! A friend of mine had a Phil and Teds and said I really needed to look into getting one. I did a little bit of research online and was happy with the reviews, loved the fact that it could be a single or double stroller, wasn't wide or long, was rugged and good for sports, and could hold 2 kids up to 70 pounds each. Some of the other authors will post more on other strollers and more comparing and contrasting than I am able to give. I'm simply going to show you the features of this stroller and why it works so well for us.
The stroller we got is a Phil and Teds Sport Buggy with Doubles Kit and we love it. When the twins were really small, I could put all 3 of my babies in there and go. It's sturdy and with air tires it feels like I'm pushing air. There are four positions so I can use it as a single stroller, stroller for toddler and baby, or two toddlers. Seats can recline or sit upright. I also love the fact that it can be a single stroller, for those times I only have one child with me, and, when it's double, that it's not extra long or extra wide. Here's some views of the stroller:
Lydia in front on top.
Side view - twins are in bassinet below.
View from the back - James and Luke sleeping in bassinet.
Now that the twins are bigger, only one baby will fit in the basinet. I sling one baby and the other two ride in the stroller. For now, my plan is for Lydia and one of the twins to ride. When the twins get too heavy to sling comfortably (this will be awhile; with Lydia I slung her until I got pregnant again when she was almost two) I will put both twins in the stroller and Lydia should be old enough to walk.
While I love this stroller, I would really only recommend it if you had three (or more) small children and needed the extra set of hands. OR, if you had two small children and weren't going to sling one. I say this because of the cost - these strollers are pricey. But, if you need a "double stroller" you may want to look into this option. I've often thought that, were I just having my first baby, I should've registered for this stroller and then had it for all my children - since it can be a great single stroller. (You could always add on the doubler kit later.)
Preserving Quiet Times for Moms
Posted by | Thursday, August 6, 2009 at 5:00 AM
I'd like to take a different angle on how to preserve your pursuit of the Lord and share a few practical ways that could hopefully help you balance out and preserve the spiritual disciplines in your busy life. I know for me, when I get busy, I might continue with one, maybe two of the spiritual disciplines, but there are always a few that are easily replaced when I am busy.
Back in college while being discipled, being a woman of balance was a daily prayer of mine and having balance in my spiritual disciplines was vital. Visualize with me for a moment the effort put forth and necessary in having a strong grasp of something in your hand. In this instance, let's use our Bibles as the object and goal of which we need to talk hold. Better yet, if you have your Bible next to you, go ahead and pick it up in such a way that you wouldn't want someone to knock it out of your hand. Notice the strongest part of your hand's grasp is your thumb, which is probably on the bottom side of your Bible and all four of your fingers are needed on top making this the strongest one-handed hold possible, right? You can't hold the Word tightly with just four fingers and using just your thumb and your index finger would not create a strong enough grasp of the Word. In this illustration, your fingers represent hearing the Word, reading the Word, studying the Word, and memorizing the Word. Lastly, meditation is the thumb, for it is used in conjuction with each of the other four methods. Unless you meditate and chew on the Word in conjuction with reading, in conjuction with hearing, in conjuction with studying, and in conjuction with memorizing, wouldn't you agree it's difficult to say that you are truly saturating your life and grasping the Word in its entirety?
Scripture Memory: I've mentioned this in the past, but my most favorite way to hide the Word of God in my heart is through this scripture memory box. You can make one yourself very inexpensively. I need organization, as well as as system of repetition to keep past scriptures, that I've hidden in my heart, fresh on and at the forefront of my mind. As a mother of small children, a great place for this box is right beside the glider where I spend lots of my time. More great places to keep your box could be on your nightstand, in your car as you drive to work, on your desk at work or next to your stove where you'll be standing and spending lot of time cooking, cleaning, unloading the dishwasher, washing bottles, etc.. Love this method! (An easy way to make the tabs is to buy the index card dividers that are labeled A-Z, turn them around, and write the names of each of the scripture memory dividers. You will need to buy two packs. However, I do not use the "odd/even" tabs in my box, but you definitely could incorporate that in your box, if desired.)
Hearing the Word: This advice is a given, but I feel the need to mention it briefly. Please stay faithful to attending church on Sundays, and if available your small group, Sunday school, or classes of the like. It's so important to have this type of "hearing" of the Word in your life. If are a super sleepy Mama, glued to the glider and feeling like you have zero time and absolutely no self-control in keeping your eyes open for reading the Word, definitely take advantage of the resources you have online for "hearing" of the Word. If you have an ipod, shuffle, etc.. your options are endless. There are so many free sermons out there. If anything, tap into a great church's website and listen to its weekly sermons. On itunes, search for free sermons/messages from great pastors like, Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, and John Piper.
Reading the Word: Margaret did a fantastic job emphasizing the importance of choosing YOUR time of day to stay persistent in seeking the Lord daily. My heart is always encouraged when I read about how other busy Moms fight for that time in the Word. Thank you Margaret. Some people like to read the Bible chronologically, pick books of the Bible and read them in their entirety before moving onto another book, read parts of the Old Testament and New Testament to gain an understanding of the big picture of the Word of God, etc.. There are superb reading plans out there for those of you who love to have a scheduled reading. The Discipleship Study called One on One with God is a great course to take if you know of anyone who is teaching it in your area. Their website has great free downloads to assist you in your walk, such as a wonderful reading calendar that I love, lined pages on which to take notes during your daily Bible reading times, lined pages for sermon notes, and a great prayer template to keep you accountable to a balanced prayer life. All of these resources are 5½” X 8½”, the size of a small, loose-leaf notebook and when you print them off, you get two of each, so put a packet together for another busy mom.
Studying the Scriptures: My husband just told me of a really good program called "Logos" for your computer containing language study tools, all kinds of commentaries, etc.. but it's pretty expensive. We do not have it on our computer, but I just thought I'd throw it out there for those of you who are interested.
Prayer: Again, here is a great printable prayer template that will fit nicely in your Bible and help you truly remember to pray for many areas in your life, in our Nation, on the mission field, etc.. I've shared this before, but I love making my own calendar in Microsoft Word and having several things allotted to each day to pray for. Each week could be the same or you can alternate every other week with the same prayer requests. You need a good, quiet thirty minutes to an hour on the computer as you take time to think through all that you want prayer for in your life, as well as in others' lives, but it's well worth the time invested.
I feel so much conviction, as I type these resources out, because I know that I struggle with balancing these areas in my life just as much as anyone else. I DO NOT have all of these mastered and actually, this post really has encouraged me to pull out some of these resources as I get ready to go through a big change in our family. But I LOVE it when I actually am faithful to be that woman of balance seeking the Lord with all my heart in the areas above. Knowing that there are useful and most importantly practical ways to help me preserve my time with the Lord amongst such a wonderfully busy life as a Mother is helping me pave the way to seizing and being a good steward of the time the Lord has given me in my day.
What are some of the practical ways you stay abreast and fresh in your pursuit of the Lord?
Back in college while being discipled, being a woman of balance was a daily prayer of mine and having balance in my spiritual disciplines was vital. Visualize with me for a moment the effort put forth and necessary in having a strong grasp of something in your hand. In this instance, let's use our Bibles as the object and goal of which we need to talk hold. Better yet, if you have your Bible next to you, go ahead and pick it up in such a way that you wouldn't want someone to knock it out of your hand. Notice the strongest part of your hand's grasp is your thumb, which is probably on the bottom side of your Bible and all four of your fingers are needed on top making this the strongest one-handed hold possible, right? You can't hold the Word tightly with just four fingers and using just your thumb and your index finger would not create a strong enough grasp of the Word. In this illustration, your fingers represent hearing the Word, reading the Word, studying the Word, and memorizing the Word. Lastly, meditation is the thumb, for it is used in conjuction with each of the other four methods. Unless you meditate and chew on the Word in conjuction with reading, in conjuction with hearing, in conjuction with studying, and in conjuction with memorizing, wouldn't you agree it's difficult to say that you are truly saturating your life and grasping the Word in its entirety?
Scripture Memory: I've mentioned this in the past, but my most favorite way to hide the Word of God in my heart is through this scripture memory box. You can make one yourself very inexpensively. I need organization, as well as as system of repetition to keep past scriptures, that I've hidden in my heart, fresh on and at the forefront of my mind. As a mother of small children, a great place for this box is right beside the glider where I spend lots of my time. More great places to keep your box could be on your nightstand, in your car as you drive to work, on your desk at work or next to your stove where you'll be standing and spending lot of time cooking, cleaning, unloading the dishwasher, washing bottles, etc.. Love this method! (An easy way to make the tabs is to buy the index card dividers that are labeled A-Z, turn them around, and write the names of each of the scripture memory dividers. You will need to buy two packs. However, I do not use the "odd/even" tabs in my box, but you definitely could incorporate that in your box, if desired.)
Hearing the Word: This advice is a given, but I feel the need to mention it briefly. Please stay faithful to attending church on Sundays, and if available your small group, Sunday school, or classes of the like. It's so important to have this type of "hearing" of the Word in your life. If are a super sleepy Mama, glued to the glider and feeling like you have zero time and absolutely no self-control in keeping your eyes open for reading the Word, definitely take advantage of the resources you have online for "hearing" of the Word. If you have an ipod, shuffle, etc.. your options are endless. There are so many free sermons out there. If anything, tap into a great church's website and listen to its weekly sermons. On itunes, search for free sermons/messages from great pastors like, Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, and John Piper.
Reading the Word: Margaret did a fantastic job emphasizing the importance of choosing YOUR time of day to stay persistent in seeking the Lord daily. My heart is always encouraged when I read about how other busy Moms fight for that time in the Word. Thank you Margaret. Some people like to read the Bible chronologically, pick books of the Bible and read them in their entirety before moving onto another book, read parts of the Old Testament and New Testament to gain an understanding of the big picture of the Word of God, etc.. There are superb reading plans out there for those of you who love to have a scheduled reading. The Discipleship Study called One on One with God is a great course to take if you know of anyone who is teaching it in your area. Their website has great free downloads to assist you in your walk, such as a wonderful reading calendar that I love, lined pages on which to take notes during your daily Bible reading times, lined pages for sermon notes, and a great prayer template to keep you accountable to a balanced prayer life. All of these resources are 5½” X 8½”, the size of a small, loose-leaf notebook and when you print them off, you get two of each, so put a packet together for another busy mom.
Studying the Scriptures: My husband just told me of a really good program called "Logos" for your computer containing language study tools, all kinds of commentaries, etc.. but it's pretty expensive. We do not have it on our computer, but I just thought I'd throw it out there for those of you who are interested.
Prayer: Again, here is a great printable prayer template that will fit nicely in your Bible and help you truly remember to pray for many areas in your life, in our Nation, on the mission field, etc.. I've shared this before, but I love making my own calendar in Microsoft Word and having several things allotted to each day to pray for. Each week could be the same or you can alternate every other week with the same prayer requests. You need a good, quiet thirty minutes to an hour on the computer as you take time to think through all that you want prayer for in your life, as well as in others' lives, but it's well worth the time invested.
I feel so much conviction, as I type these resources out, because I know that I struggle with balancing these areas in my life just as much as anyone else. I DO NOT have all of these mastered and actually, this post really has encouraged me to pull out some of these resources as I get ready to go through a big change in our family. But I LOVE it when I actually am faithful to be that woman of balance seeking the Lord with all my heart in the areas above. Knowing that there are useful and most importantly practical ways to help me preserve my time with the Lord amongst such a wonderfully busy life as a Mother is helping me pave the way to seizing and being a good steward of the time the Lord has given me in my day.
What are some of the practical ways you stay abreast and fresh in your pursuit of the Lord?
Busy Mom Quiet Times
Posted by | Monday, August 3, 2009 at 6:00 AM
The topic for this week is “Busy Mom Quiet Times”. You may be asking yourself, “What is that? I have [insert number] kids and they are always running around. How can I possibly have any quiet time?” I know I’ve found myself asking that question many times, and there are certain seasons of life when a truly quiet time is not possible. I know after my both of my kids were born, while we were in the midst of all the newborn craziness, I went through what I would consider a spiritually dry time. When I wasn’t nursing or rocking the new baby I was trying to catch up on much needed sleep. So, my devotions were very brief. For a few months, I just didn’t feel connected to the Lord in my bible reading or prayer times. This was probably due to a lack of sleep and a drastic change in hormones, but it is important to stick with it anyway. That season soon ended and I was able to once again spend more meaningful time studying the Word. However, even when the newborn stage ends, it isn’t as if you aren’t that busy anymore. We all know that moms, especially moms with young children, get very little time to themselves. So how can you carve out and preserve time alone with the Lord? Be creative and be flexible!
For years my devotional time was always at night right before bed. I am a night owl and felt like I could always be consistent with it. After all, I went to sleep every night so I could read and pray every night before going to bed. But, now that my kids are small, I find it very hard to concentrate once I’m in the bed. And, with younger kids, you never know whey they’ll be up again needing something so I wanted to hit the sack asap. However, I am also not a morning person at all! Mornings are crazy enough with getting up, getting myself and everyone else ready, fixing and cleaning up breakfast, any morning errands, making beds, etc. I just knew I couldn’t fit bible study time into all that and not rush through it. I wanted to be able to take my time. (Many, many people disagree with me. I’ve read so many books that encourage an early morning quiet time. Honestly, this just isn’t me! So, I don’t sweat it and find a time that works.) My solution for now is to have my quiet time during afternoon naps. Both of my kids sleep at the same time and for the same length of time every day. So, as soon as they are down, I have time for my devotions. I don’t have to rush through them and once I finish, I have some time left to work on any projects that I want to do or that need my attention (like sewing or scrapbooking).
You may be thinking, “But, naptime is the only time I have to fold laundry, clean up the kitchen, prepare dinner, etc.”. I used to think the same thing. So, what I try to do now is to accomplish all of those tasks while the kids are awake so I can preserve naptime for my time with the Lord. This isn’t always easy. We all know that it is much easier to clean/cook/whatever when the kids aren’t around, but think of the benefits. If the kids never see you clean or cook because it is done only when they aren’t in the way, how will they come to appreciate all the work it requires? Also, I find that it teaches my children (especially my three year old) to help me! We can make a game out of cleaning up and putting things away. She can fold washcloths and put away her own clothes, peel carrots, and help me empty the dishwasher. It might take longer, and may not be up to my standards, but she is learning to help and contribute to the household AND I can still have quiet time while she sleeps! Now, I know this won’t work for everyone and I’ll have to temporarily change my routine if the Lord blesses us with another child, but for now, it ensures that I have a time devoted to the Lord every day. (I’m also planning on maintaining a quite time every afternoon even once our kids stop napping. I’m hoping that they will stay on their beds and read quietly for an hour or so even if they don’t sleep. Even as I write this my daughter hasn’t napped for two days straight so I might be doing this sooner than I thought!)
My naptime/devotional time might not work for everyone. And, it might not work for me forever. But, as kids change and schedules readjust, keep working at fitting in a personal quiet time. Morning, noon, or night, it makes no difference. I encourage all of you ladies to seek time with the Lord each and every day! Be creative and work at preserving that time. It is vitally important to your spiritual health and that effects every member of the family!
For years my devotional time was always at night right before bed. I am a night owl and felt like I could always be consistent with it. After all, I went to sleep every night so I could read and pray every night before going to bed. But, now that my kids are small, I find it very hard to concentrate once I’m in the bed. And, with younger kids, you never know whey they’ll be up again needing something so I wanted to hit the sack asap. However, I am also not a morning person at all! Mornings are crazy enough with getting up, getting myself and everyone else ready, fixing and cleaning up breakfast, any morning errands, making beds, etc. I just knew I couldn’t fit bible study time into all that and not rush through it. I wanted to be able to take my time. (Many, many people disagree with me. I’ve read so many books that encourage an early morning quiet time. Honestly, this just isn’t me! So, I don’t sweat it and find a time that works.) My solution for now is to have my quiet time during afternoon naps. Both of my kids sleep at the same time and for the same length of time every day. So, as soon as they are down, I have time for my devotions. I don’t have to rush through them and once I finish, I have some time left to work on any projects that I want to do or that need my attention (like sewing or scrapbooking).
You may be thinking, “But, naptime is the only time I have to fold laundry, clean up the kitchen, prepare dinner, etc.”. I used to think the same thing. So, what I try to do now is to accomplish all of those tasks while the kids are awake so I can preserve naptime for my time with the Lord. This isn’t always easy. We all know that it is much easier to clean/cook/whatever when the kids aren’t around, but think of the benefits. If the kids never see you clean or cook because it is done only when they aren’t in the way, how will they come to appreciate all the work it requires? Also, I find that it teaches my children (especially my three year old) to help me! We can make a game out of cleaning up and putting things away. She can fold washcloths and put away her own clothes, peel carrots, and help me empty the dishwasher. It might take longer, and may not be up to my standards, but she is learning to help and contribute to the household AND I can still have quiet time while she sleeps! Now, I know this won’t work for everyone and I’ll have to temporarily change my routine if the Lord blesses us with another child, but for now, it ensures that I have a time devoted to the Lord every day. (I’m also planning on maintaining a quite time every afternoon even once our kids stop napping. I’m hoping that they will stay on their beds and read quietly for an hour or so even if they don’t sleep. Even as I write this my daughter hasn’t napped for two days straight so I might be doing this sooner than I thought!)
My naptime/devotional time might not work for everyone. And, it might not work for me forever. But, as kids change and schedules readjust, keep working at fitting in a personal quiet time. Morning, noon, or night, it makes no difference. I encourage all of you ladies to seek time with the Lord each and every day! Be creative and work at preserving that time. It is vitally important to your spiritual health and that effects every member of the family!
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